February 20

There are 46 years between February 20, 1972 and February 20, 2018.

On these dates, I lost both my grandmoms. One I never knew, who died 3 months before my parents got married. And the one I always knew and have had to figure out how to live without.

No more dinner prep phone calls to ask a question.
No more "I am out taking a walk" phone calls to catch up on the days.
No more sitting together to watch a Hallmark movie.
No more cards in the mail.

But also no more pain.
No more feeling useless or bored.

But why the same day?
Why did my mom lose both her mom and her mother-in-law on the same date?
Why did I lose both of my Grams on the same date?

Just irony?
A bittersweet comfort?
A keen way to remember them both?

It's a date I won't forget.


Today, it has been 6 months since February 20, 2018 and the urge to pick up a phone is still there.