My Treehouse

The sun dapples on my sofa and casts shadows of leaves. The baby has always been intrigued by this. I chose not to put curtains up on all the windows when I moved in because it would obstruct the view of the tree just outside the windows. Look out any window and you can trees and picturesque-ness. I just love where I live.

So I guess you can call it a revelation or a "Duh!"when I walked into the living room yesterday and realized why I liked the room so much... well our apartment for that matter. The green leaves of the maple amassed against the window swaying in the breeze met me and I said, "It feels like we are living in a treehouse!" My husband said, "Duh!"

I guess this is why on even very fine days when it seems a shame to be inside I don't feel like I am missing out on that much if I stay in. The windows are open the breezes are blowing and the trees shadows are dappling on the sofa and it almost feels like I am outside.

It is funny because I was always envious of my cousins' treehouse and here all along -well at least the last 2+ years- I've kind of been living in one.

My Treehouse views...

Call Me Nostagic

Once my little boy could sit up I couldn't wait to introduce him to my old Fisher Price Chime Ball.
I went into my parent's hot attic to hunt this old memorable toy down. I think he likes it.



So call me nostalgic but the next thing I wanted for him was the crib activity toy my brother and I used in our crib and playpen. Unfortunately, we couldn't find that in the attic. So I looked to ebay. That was a bit of a saga, I won't go into but after cleaning with a toothbrush my boy has his own 1973 Fisher Price crib toy which he is currently enjoying. They just don't make anything like this these days or at least nothing I could find.


Based on the price these toys were going for on Ebay, I must not be the only nostalgic 30something parent wanting their new baby to play with the same toy they used when they were young.

A Peachy Saga

I have heard,"Its a great year for peaches. They like it hot and dry." We have had both heat and little rain. So of course this baby food making momma wants her boy to have the delight of delicious peaches. However, peaches are on the "Dirty Dozen List*" and so I have been apprehensive about feeding him peaches and unsure if I could really afford organic peaches.

In my comings and goings to different Farmers Markets, I have been inquiring with the farmers about just how chemical free their peaches are. They always say the same thing. "We don't like to spray but it is practically impossible not to." Nevertheless they have convinced me that their peaches are cleaner and safer than any conventional peach from the store. And we have been enjoying them.

The other day I was talking to a neighbor about all things organic and he mentioned he had some peaches from the orchard on the property that we live on. Duh, I look out at these abandoned peach trees every time I do dishes. I don't know why it didn't occur to me to at least inquire about them. Later that night, he gave us a shopping bag full of peaches - about 30 total.

You can't get anymore organic than an abandoned peach tree! And free too!

Because the weather has been so ideal for peaches this year these untended peaches are beautiful! Certainly not perfect, he did have to pick around for really good ones, but they were sweet and luscious. We made fruit smoothies, ate them fresh, I pureed them for the baby and now have 48 peach cubes in the freezer. I also made a lovely peach bread which I shared with my neighbor. (I added some unsprayed raspberries for a little extra something. They weren't free..)

As I looked out at the orchard peeling peaches through out the week, I just couldn't help but stand in awe over how God provided for me in such a big small way. He saved me money that's for sure but He also provided us with something pure that I can feed my son knowing the only pest control used on these gift peaches were his own created nature.

It is just peachy how God provides for us and sometimes in the most extraordinary and simple ways.

* Dirty Dozen List -Most Contaminated

• Peaches
• Apples
• Sweet Bell Peppers
• Celery
• Nectarines
• Strawberries
• Cherries
• Pears
• Grapes (Imported)
• Spinach
• Lettuce
• Potatoes

Sunday Mornings

It is Sunday morning, the baby is exploring and learning how to sit up on his own. He woke up from his nap cranky and we missed our window to go to church. Instead, he is reaching for things that interest him and then chewing all over them. I have a mix of praise music playing. I have been listening to to it over and over again all morning. It is the best of the best, the ones that drive me to lift up my arms in worship. The ones that make me tear up. Its the music that I listened to when I was pregnant and overwhelmed with thankfulness - or felt I should be more thankful. Some of the music is old and reminds me of Sundays long ago...

Sundays long ago, I rose early and drove 45 minutes to get to my singles only service. Those days were sometimes more frenzied and full of rant than full of worship. The focus more often than not was what new guys were there and why weren't the regular guys ever asking any of us out. Or what to do if one of them had! Sometimes it seems like yesterday and sometimes a lifetime ago.

I do miss the weekly fellowship of the girls. I miss the passionate way Lauren sang (she sang one of the songs on my mix.) But I don't miss the constancy of my guy radar always being on. It was exhausting. The times have changed, so many of us "graduated" from the group and it is as it should be. Many of us are married now and have the babies we longed for. We have changed and grown, drifted and moved.

I hope we will always remember those Sunday mornings and the really important parts of them - the music we worshiped to and the true friends we made and keep all these years later.

Sundays are just different now now, our radar is more for keeping little hands out of places they shouldn't be but the music can still be the same. The music can take us back to the best of those times and how they shaped us and make us all the more thankful to the One who shaped us. One who moved us from one kind of frenzy to another!

The Farmers Market

My baby is 6 months old now. In preparing for him to start solids I have been trying to buy more organic foods -particularly the "Dirty Dozen." I also thought I should get into going to Farmer's Markets because many of the local growers are technically organic just not certified by Uncle Sam. I don't need that costly USDA seal, an Amish Farmer's word is good enough for me.

There are multiple Farmers Markets in the area so I have my pick of the town or the day.

They are quite popular and so is the importance of buying pesticide free produce. So I am not the only one interested in keeping my family's food wholesome and safe!

Being there (I've been to 2 different markets) just felt right and a little daunting as I get the lay of the land. It felt so "Old World" seeing people arrive with their baskets to fill full of lovely tomatoes and green beans. This is the closest a non-grower can get to having a garden overflowing with fresh ripe vegetation.

I just kept thinking this is the way it use to be. And evidently, the way it will continue to be.

I had my mental list of what I wanted: peaches, a cantaloupe and a grass-fed whole chicken. A quart of perfect green beans caught my eye "chemical free" the sign said. Perfect for my baby!

The other really nice thing about being a Farmer's Market shopper you can enjoy the progression of the season as fruits and veggies come in and out of season. The markets will go through November and I am already envisioning piles of acorn and butternut squash coming into season in the coming weeks. Eating what's in season is a satisfying natural way to eat. I am enjoying it more this summer. Last summer, all I wanted was canned peaches and cantaloupe. My first trimester had me swearing off anything green. So I am savoring zucchini, tomato, green beans etc all the more this summer.

Tomorrow morning off to try another Farmer's Market need more peaches, hoping for some raspberries...

I am hooked on Farmer's Markets.

This is it

My new design.

I like it because it is both whimsical and real.
Hope, glory and wonder can be both whimsical and real.
We can find hope, glory and wonder in the whimsical and real.
So I think it works.

Now to blog more faithfully. It is important that I write because the writer in me is buried under diapers and dishes.

A More Whimsical Design

What do you think of this one?

Update Needed

I decided that I needed a real update. So I am working on a visual update as well as a wordy one.

How do you like this layout?

The Times

Driving out to my friend Brandy's a couple weeks ago, I couldn't help but think about how the times have changed. We first met in 1992 during our first days of college. Here we are 18 years later still getting together.

When we were in college email was just starting. At times, I thought it kind of weird to email someone who you would later see at the dining hall and could easily tell them whatever it was that was in the email.

I remember one of my roommates staying up to the wee hours of the morning or however late the computer lab stayed open so she could be in a chat room. Most of us just had word processors in our dorm rooms... not enough to chat with!

In the summer, my little group of friends use to write each other letters - real actual letters on pretty stationary. (I use my stationary for "To Do Lists" now.) One roommate use to get creative and make envelopes out of pretty magazine pages. Brandy and I often passed around "Pass it on" cards, sometimes enclosed in a letter, or stuck on someone's door or book. This was my favorite one:
This week marks the 14th year since we graduated college both of us Elementary Education majors. Now both of us are Stay at Home Moms putting our education to work on the most important children ever.

What has happened in 14 years for us and our circle of friends? Marriages, babies, lots babies, - some awhile ago some just months ago. Sadly we've witnessed a divorce. We've followed the dreams of friends who have gone on to be a missionary and a IVCF staff worker.

We now use email instead of letters. We can't imagine life without cell phones, yet we had lives without cell phone 14 years ago!

Now we have Facebook. Sometimes I wonder what a difference an animal like Facebook would have made if we graduated and known we could easily keep in touch through that. I do think it would have made a difference.

Still its nice to think back to the summer days when I would write a juicy -hopefully witty- letter to Brandy and others about my day or week. The fact that I was apart of something so bygone-ish is a precious treasure. Those letters held together friendships much the same way that email and Facebook do today.

The times have changed. Technology has changed. Friendship that continues!

The Hula Hoop Plan

Its pretty pathetic how much TV I watch, even though I only really have 3 channels. Sometimes I get a good idea though. Marisa Tomei was on Ellen espousing the wonders of losing weight and toning your muscles with the oh so simple hula hoop.

Well shoot I can do a hula! Seems a brilliant way to work the baby belly, thighs and over all core.
So I went down to my local Wal-mart and picked up a hula hoop.

I am trying to do 10 minutes a day and already I feel like the blubber is melting away. I have sore muscles which mean something is working and its fun. I have discovered that if it is too cold or windy outside -as it has been- I can hula on my bed.

Who knows maybe I will look into breaking a record...

Ok so I just looked into breaking a record. I think I would need a babysitter for several days to pull off a stunt like that. So I think I will just stick with shedding pounds and toning muscles.

I will keep working on it and hopefully by fall I will be able to fit into all the pants that don't currently fit. In the meantime, Thank God for drawstring capris!

Popping Up

Baby and I were walking around Winterthur toward the end of March. I was catching a look at all the March flowers that waited patiently under 3 two foot blizzards this winter. It fills me with wonder how a sprout on a mission is not stopped by a mound of leaves. Spring just pushes fall out of it's way - as it has every right to do when March rolls around.

Tax Day - Tea Day

Our Little One went to his first tax protest on April 15th. He even carried his own sign.

Drips

I had an amazing domestic revelation this week. Being home all day with my "little" Sumo wrestler has given me time to take stock of well - domestic stuff.

I have come to the conclusion that it is drips that make messes.

Olive juice drips on the counter while making a salad.
Tomato sauce drips to the floor while serving dinner.
A potato peel drips to the floor leaving a brown mark.
A jelly knife drips on the counter while jamming up some toast.
Eating cookies without a plate results in drips of cookie crumbs.
Drips of water make wet socks that require new socks - thus making additional laundry unless I wear wet socks.
Slow diapering results in a loose "fire hydrant" that leads to a new change of clothes and another reason to pull out the Lysol spray cleaner.

Now I see it is the drips that do it, it amazes me that I never noticed this phenomenon for what it is and that a drip can do so much damage to a would be clean kitchen etc. It only takes a crumb or a splatter to mar what was once considered clean. It only takes a tiny drop of a mess to invite the ants in for dinner.

I think if I could harness the drips in my life I would spend less time scrubbing the floor. If I could catch it before it falls, use a plate, place the knife in the sink or use a cutting board instead of the counter I wouldn't be so constantly at war with my countertops.
If I could just get rid of the drips... I might be able to nap when baby naps. Or harken into other areas for domestic revelation like the best way to organize a cabinet ...

Like a Good Neighbor

No one can deny I grew up with really great neighbors. Mary and Charlie always had a seat for you on their porch. John F. and Charlie had these great Crab fests, all the kids would watch as they got the crabs in the pot. John G. played his Big Band music that drummed its way into our yard. Jeanie still so sweet always has that missing ingredient. I could go on and on about Sonny & Diana, Lisa & Brian, my aunt and uncle.

There is nothing like a good neighbor who will help you shovel out of the snow with their snowblower, or lend you an egg when the chickens aren't laying, or won't complain about the chickens in the backyard. I sure do miss it. I could use a good neighbor these days.

I have been out of my parent's house for 6 years now, I've yet to come across neighbors like my old neighbors at my 3 different houses. Someday when we are finally settled in our own home I hope we will find neighbors with a welcome mat on their porch. Maybe I will become the Jeanie or Mary that the neighborhood kids will reminisce about when they are in their 30s.

In the meantime, there is an apartment open next to me and downstairs from me and I am praying for something like a good neighbor.

That Clever God

I have been thinking how clever God is that he made pregnancy for humans only 9 months.

When you finally get to 9 months pregnant you are so uncomfortable. It takes an earth mover to get you out of bed to pee for the 4th time in 4 hours. Your back hurts and you snore now. Your pelvic bones ache in a way you've never experienced, making crawling into bed or your car really painful. If the table is tall enough, you sit at a table to eat while straddling your legs because your belly is too big for the table -most unladylike... Your maternity clothes are too tight and they all have stains on them from dropping food on your belly. You stand to eat because you can't sit at the table and you can't even sit on the sofa with a lap desk - because your lap is gone... and people keep saying "I didn't think it was possible for you to get any bigger" or "no baby yet?!"

To think at the beginning whenever I thought or read or watched labor I CRIED! Now I pour over the labor chapters hoping to remember everything and consider this "light reading." And I am like bring it on! I want my ankles back. I want my lap back. I want my baby!

God surely knew what he was doing when he planned a 9 month gestation because much longer and the population might have never grown. He gets you to the point where you are so ready for whatever kind of pain labor will be.

-5 days to due date, ready when you are Baby.

Spring for a Second

Driving home the sun was setting behind me. It was a giant orange orb settling down in the western sky. The sky was full of reds and oranges and pinks and it reflected on the trees in front of me for just a brief period of time. This reflection of light caused the trees to look as if they were about to burst into their spring red buds. You know that red haze that means soon those little buds will burst forth into a green haze and finally lush green leaves. What a splash of color among the reality of gray middle of winter trees that look like they have no life in them.

And as I made my way down the road, the sun slipped lower and with it the reflecting light on the trees and it was back to the gray of winter. I felt blessed to have caught this glimpse - this reminder that spring is right around the corner.

The Pink Chair

The pink chair is a hand me down from my old job. It really is the shabbiest thing - there I admit it.
But I love this chair! There are those who want me to at least have it reupholstered. I am not sure.

How many times did I plop down on this chair in Jim's office and pour out my troubles with work or life... usually more life than work.

Jim would offer words of wisdom and counsel. The pink chair is symbolic. It is a testimony of wonderful counsel I received while sitting in it, whether from Jim or the others there. I changed -in my head and heart - for the better. How can you cover that up?

Perhaps I will start with at least covering up the arm rests. And go from there. Perhaps its new use - that as a place to feed baby will inspire a new color ... until then pink and shabby it will remain.

No Donkey huh?

So I have been thinking a lot about Mary making the trek with Joseph to be counted in the census. My thoughts comprised whether she had a certain look or a certain way she said "Joseph" that let him know that she needed to "go" again. I mean you go a lot when you are 9 months pregnant!

I mentioned this to the pastor I work with saying it must have been difficult getting on and off the donkey at 9 months pregnant too and of course multiple times because she had to "go."

He said no where in the Bible does it say that Mary rode on a donkey at all. I read all the Christmas scriptures there is no donkey! Just one of the many assumption made about Christmas. I mean how many movies depict this? How many Christmas greeting cards picture Mary sitting side saddle on a donkey with Joseph leading the way?

So maybe she didn't have to get up and down maybe she just walked the 100+/- miles. I am not sure which was worse. Miles walking on sore swollen feet doesn't sound fun either. To be sure she didn't have my fabulous -albeit stained- Easy Spirit shoes! Donkey or not, surely Joseph was a sympathetic travel companion for this heavy with child woman who probably needed to stop to visit an obliging rock or bush more than once.

A friend told me when she was pregnant during Christmas that she saw Christmas from a different perspective. I had have to say the same. I have thought about more than frequent urination while traveling. The carols we sing about the infant Jesus touch my heart differently now. It is refreshing to see Christmas from this different perspective. I suspect that I will see Christmas from a different perspective next year too.

Hormones and Shoes

I have been known to cry over Hallmark commercials. My husband thinks I am ridiculous. To be sure, over the course of the last few months of had my moments of crying over ridiculous things and some not so ridiculous things - like shoes.

There came a point a couple weeks ago where my shoes just didn't fit anymore. So I had to find something in a brown shoe that would fit my fat feet!

I was at the outlets in Lancaster and I came across a shoe that would work. But in the end, I decided to wait and see if I could find something better. Wow, did I find something better!
I saw an EasySpirit store and decided to check out what they had.
They had this beauty...OK maybe not the most beautiful shoe but it quite possibly the most comfortable shoe I have ever worn. So you can imagine my utter despair when I dropped a piece of cauliflower cooked in chicken thighs on top of one of them. I cried. I cursed. I wailed to my husband, "they are the only shoes that fit me and they are ruined." Did I mention I cried.... for 3 days. I was just sick over these shoes. We tried baking powder, Dawn, Shout, a sponge, a toothbrush...

And in the end, I have a slightly imperfect shoe. The dye is a little washed out. But they are still just as comfortable as they ever were and I hardly notice the discoloration now. Honestly, they turned out much better than I feared.

I still can't believe how emotional I got over these shoes though. Something like hormones took over any sense I had. But I guess you'll have that sometimes.

Leaping Through Stress

Leaping through stress, I wish I could say that was the verb I am living right now. My action verbs right now are more like dwelling on stress, listing stressors, and praying for solutions for my stresses. Ok so I am praying but I can't say I feel like I am making much headway just yet.

I compiled a list yesterday of 15+ stressful items. Some piddly and supposedly easy to solve others that will require the movement of God's provision - probably at the last minute!

Driving home tonight, I was thinking I need some kind of vacation.
Then someone spoke up with its little hand or foot and this verse came to mind.

Luke 1: 39-45 - Mary Visits Elizabeth

³⁹At that time Mary got ready and hurried to a town in the hill country of Judea, ⁴⁰where she entered Zechariah's home and greeted Elizabeth. ⁴¹When Elizabeth heard Mary's greeting, the baby leaped in her womb, and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit. ⁴²In a loud voice she exclaimed: "Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the child you will bear! ⁴³But why am I so favored, that the mother of my Lord should come to me? ⁴⁴As soon as the sound of your greeting reached my ears, the baby in my womb leaped for joy. ⁴⁵Blessed is she who has believed that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished!"

I thought to myself, "Huh maybe the little leap I just felt is what Elizabeth felt when Mary and the invitro Jesus showed up at the door." To be sure any leaping I felt is being caused by stress -not the incarnate Jesus- but it was also a little mental vacation. I felt that I could relate to this woman in a different way, and I could imagine that what I have been feeling she had felt too. Momentarily, I felt like I had leaped out of my own stress and into some new perspective and felt just a little bit refreshed.

Always Blooming

I have watched these flowers for the last few months. I sometimes felt like they were living in their own little alternate reality like Narnia - always blooming, never dying.

Even when all the other flowers around it faded and died this clump of flowers never stopped blooming. Now I suppose the landlord's mother could have cut off the deadheads before I ever I had a chance to see them. But I don't know for sure.

I have deeply enjoyed their happy bright, bright yellow, the unblemished petals and the way they stand out among the crowd as if to say, " I am picture of perfection - enjoy me." So I have.

A Glimpse of the Slots

On vacation this year we went to Howe Caverns. It was a highlight on an otherwise kind of frustrating holiday. When your trip revolves around driving steam cars that go back to 1913 to 1923 you have to expect breakdowns. So you have to expect... frustration too. But for Howe Cavern day, we took a regular car because it was a pretty long drive.

Like most caverns there were stalagmites and stalactites and a cool 55ish degree temperature. Howe Caverns has something I never saw before and the tour guide saved the best for last.
It was a glimpse into the place I long to go. I believe the guide called it the "Winding Way" but it looked just like a gray Slot Canyon.

Oh how I long to go to Slot Canyon. This tour through the cave was like a glimpse of the Slot Canyon. It wasn't warm and sunny and bright or colorful but it has the striations and the waves. It has the curves and the feel of moving along through a tunnel -long ago carved out by moving water. It was really quite exhilarating!

Boasting

I am trying to read through the Bible in chronological order. Its taking a while. I always get stuck in Jeremiah. It was probably 15 years ago the last time I attempted it. Here I am slugging my way through it again.

Jeremiah 9 was just full of wailing, desolation, and sin hardly inspiring until I go to this:

²³Thus says the LORD:
"Let not the wise man boast in his wisdom,
let not the mighty man boast in his might,
let not the rich man boast in his riches,

²⁴but let him who boasts boast in this,
that he understands and knows me,
that I am the LORD who
practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth.
For in these things I delight, declares the LORD."

Can there be anything more inspiring that inspite of our sin, desolation, and tears we have a God who understands and know us. He practices (the NIV uses exercises) steadfast love, justice and righteousness. And he delights in in exercising love, justice and righteousness on us. All this right there in Jeremiah... I guess I will keep reading.

Images of Summer

The Couple
A couple times now, I have come to an intersection at the same time as them. Who is "them"?
A tall, gray haired couple holding hands and huffing at good clip up an incline. He has a Santa Claus beard and wiry, fly away hair. She always wears a kilt and a plaid shirt that doesn't remotely match. I always wait and let them cross the street first. I watch them and smile and I can just hear my friend say, "Bless their heart. Aren't they just precious." And they are.

Dad's Fig Tree
For years my dad has struggled with fig trees. In our area they require a lot of tender, love and care. He gave it amply but often received no fruit for his efforts. Now -finally- he has a fig tree that is so large. It looks to be budding with more fruit than he will know what to do with. I recall the bowlful of figs presented to us nearly 8 years ago when we were in Italy. I don't know if they will be comparable but its nice to see he is about to get some reward for all his work.

The Perfect Pool
I took a dip in the pool one day last week. It was delightful and refreshing and crystal clean. The temperature was perfect. That's a first for me and this pool.

The Peach Smoothie
With the removal of my useless blender-ing appliance and the receiving of a new one from mom's yardsale find, we have been enjoying peach smoothies. I froze the peaches for this purpose. I mixed them with apple juice and an occasional kiwi. They are perfectly sweet and coldly refreshing. Not to mention highly nutritious.

These are just a few images from my summer thus far. No pictures, you just have to use your imagination... particularly when imagining "them".

Saying a Final Good Bye

The twinkling Christmas lights on the porch gave a feel of festivity and welcoming home. The green and white beckoned me to enter. I remember the first time I walked in. I knew immediately I was at home.

Not the kind of home that comes with parents and remnants of childhood still up in the attic and in the backs of closets, but a new different kind of home. A home so full of history, its a wonder the walls don't talk. A home this seems to hold you in the palm of its hand and wraps its walls around you like a blanket. A home that nurtured despite leaking pipes or peeling lead paint. I felt so blessed and honored to become a part of the ongoing history.

Then there were the others living in the house. They offered so much to the experience of this special home. Wonderful, witty and vibrant women who loved candlelit dinners on the porch, snuggling up with cats and cozy blankets while watching PBS and offering words of wisdom and comfort when life outside the house got tough.

It has been over a year since I got married and moved out of the house, I have at times deeply missed this home and my friends. I still had a key partly because I just couldn't give it up and partly because there were still remnants of mine there that I might need to get one day. But I gave up the key this week and said a final good-bye to the house. You see those wonderful women I lived with are moving on. Its almost tragic to think of them not being there and of my home belonging to someone else.

I can't help but wonder did that glorious, nurturing, in the palms of His hands feeling always belong to that house or did it descend on the house 8 +/- years ago when a handful of recent college graduates needed a place to live and God opened the door of this home... His home for all of us however short or long our stay. Regardless of how long, I hope the feeling continues for the new tenants or owners so they to can know the joy and honor of living in such a home.

No matter where I live and no matter who lives there this home will always be in my heart.

Vicariously in Italy

One of my former students found me on Facebook a couple months ago. He had come across this picture I sent to him years ago of me "holding up" the Leaning Tower of Pisa. He wanted to let me know that he was going to Italy for a 6 week semester.
I was more than thrilled to hear from him and even more thrilled to hear his news! Having been single for so long, I had the great opportunity of doing a lot of traveling and I desperately wanted my students to see the world too!

So he is there now enjoying all the sights, smells and tastes of Italy. I living vicariously through him by reading his blog and Facebook updates! As his old teacher, I am filled with unspeakable pride when I see the skill with which he writes and the insight and imagery he uses to enable us to be there with him. I am just so glad that he is getting this experience. It is the fulfillment of my longheld desires for my students - to see God's world and explore of much of it as they can.

Springtime at Longwood

I've been averaging 1-2 walks a week at Longwood and it is amazing how they keep it ever changing. There is always something new popping out. One thing I love is the sweet fragrance that permeates the pathways. Sometimes its like you are walking through a perfumery. In some places, you just catch a whiff of sweetness as a breeze blows and then it is gone.

The colors are vibrant, they feel even more vibrant when they stand all together.

My dress blows in the breeze and brushes past the tulips...

So I will keep taking my beautiful walks... I can't say that I am losing the pounds I want to but at least I am not putting more on!

First Pie

I have never been much of a pie person. I prefer a quick bread made of old bananas and baseball bat size zucchini. For years my friend told me pie dough is easier than I think. So with my trusty Kitchen Aid mixer and last years blueberries I set out to make a pie for Easter dessert.

I used a recipe from the Williams and Sonoma Pie cookbook. It called for 4 cups of blueberries but I only had 3. Undaunted I decided to supplement with the apples neither of us were eating.

The mid-way results... I tried not think of the shredded apples as anything but shredded apple. Because it kind of looked like worms...

The finished product was attractive to look at as well as eat. For a first attempt, I'd say I was well pleased. Dad and Hubby enjoyed their slices too. I am looking forward to fruit season. I am dreaming of strawberries, cherries and peaches and if I can find a way to make coconut custard without dairy I'll be one happy pie making fool!

Tax Tea Party

I went to a tea party yesterday... a tax day tea party. I was planning to go to town anyway for a massage. Then, I found out that there was a tea party planned for the corners of State and Union in Kennett Square, PA which was exactly where I was headed! So I figured I would try to do both.

As luck would have it, I had time before my appointment so I joined in with the protesters. It was raining but people didn't seem to mind they just put clear plastic bags over their protest signs. We waved tea bags, American flags, and a "Don't tread on me" flag at the cars as they drove by and many people honked their cars horns in solidarity. For as liberal as this area is I was impressed by the turn out and the honks. A good 50 people were there.

It was a beautiful sight to see these die-hard Americans protest our governments spending and taxing habits. We pay too much. When I think of all the things I could do with my tax money... and when I hear about all the things they spend on that are really behind the scope of what our fore fathers envisioned for government.... It is staggering and kind of depressing.

I felt proud to be American yesterday standing in the rain with people who have also feel they are Taxed Enough Already.

Beautiful Exercise

I have been stopping at Longwood Gardens after work to walk. It has been glorious. Each time I go I find some new delight popping up or blooming. Last week, there were pools of purple flowers growing in the grass. If you didn't get there on the right days you missed out. Today they were gone because the grass was newly mowed. Going there makes exercising a beautiful thing.

Stunning News

With the last post in mind...

I heard marvelous news this week, news that has left me breathless and excited. In the wonder of the news, I want to spend some time reveling in the God who made it happen and not just what happened. This is a subtle perspective shift but I think it may result in more adoration directed to a worthy God.

I rejoice with a friend who I quoted here 2 year ago. She is at long last engaged. The prayers that have been prayed over the years for these dear woman are beyond counting. As much as I am happy with the results/answer, I so want to adore God who listens, comforts and with great mercy bestows just because it is in His nature.

I rejoice with a dear couple who have had multiple miscarriages but have this week reached a pivotal point - the 2nd Trimester! If all continues to go well, they will have 2nd son in October.
So I give adoration to God who inspires perseverance, who comforts heartache and has such abundant grace and mercy.

God's Grace and Mercy can there be anything more stunning and exciting and breathtaking?

It can (and should) be the headline news everyday. News that never gets stale and always makes your jaw drop.

A Trip with Tripp on a Perspective Shift

I watched this video clip of Paul Tripp today... it was like a trip out of my frazzled, frustrated and cranky day. (anything in quotes came from the video)




He talked about the "dirty secret of the church"... that the church is full of people with fear, doubt, anxiety and disappointment all that stuff the world has. Christians don't have it together that's clear when I look in the mirror. And why? because of where we put our focus and where we "run to".

When we run to anything other than God, "who is always with us" we will only find disappointment, fear, anxiety, bitterness, frustration etc...

When we experience those things it is clear we have lost our balance and forgotten what we need to always remember that "God is always with us."

The end of the video was most moving to me, he speaks of the tragedy that people say, "God hasn't become this thing that stuns me. That leaves me breathless and leaves me excited."

What a poke to the heart that is. I am ashamed that so often I am not stunned, I am not breathless and I am not excited by God. And, when I am stunned, breathless and excited its because of what He has done not because who He is.

Speechless Again

I was saddened to hear about that private plane crash in Montana. Seven beautiful young children -gone- along with their parents.

Then I read here... (you can read it yourself but I will summarize)

The plane crashed next to or in Holy Cross Cemetery near Butte, Montana. In this cemetery, there is the Tomb of the Unborn. A memorial to all those children aborted in our country.

The irony is that 9 of the people on the plane were directly related to of Irving 'Bud' Feldkamp, owner of the largest for-profit abortion chain in the nation....

I won't judge its not my place but I can't help myself from standing wide eyed and draw dropped at this news.

On some level, this reads like a page out of the Old Testament where some wicked person/nation is disseminated in God's wrath. It looks like God has exacted justice/punishment/consequences in such a tangible way. It reinforces in me that I never want to be in the hands of an angry God or God who has just had enough.

I feel there has been a paradigm shift within myself. A shift into a deeper realization that God means what He says. He means business. He knows what He is doing. And who are we to question or doubt how He chooses to punish or bless humanity.

I continue to feel stunned and speechless yet with a renewed sense of "the fear of Lord".

I can only hope the Feldkamps find comfort and repentance and that somehow this tragedy will be used to end abortion... somehow that only God can control and fructify.

Concidences... I think Not

From CNN: "Connie and Donald McCracken were watching CNN one evening last week when they learned of the tragic death of actress Natasha Richardson from a head injury. Immediately, their minds turned to their 7-year-old daughter, Morgan, who was upstairs getting ready for bed."

Morgan got hit in the head by a baseball 2 today earlier and seemed fine. The night they were watching the news about Natasha is the night Morgan got a headache. A headache became severe very quickly. With Natasha in mind the McCrackens took Morgan to the hospital. The neurosurgeon got her in the nick of time. Morgan did indeed have the same injury that Natasha had. (Full story here at CNN) Thankfully, she has survived.

If I were Liam (Natasha's husband) I would feel like at least some good has come out her death. I would imagine its like the bittersweet knowledge of knowing that deceased loved one lives on in the people who were helped through organ donation. Their loved may be gone but their heart, liver, kidneys etc live on. Natasha may be gone but will more people wear helmets now when skiing? Will more people seek medical attention when they get hit in the head? All thanks to Natasha and her freak accident...

I can't help but wonder what lies in store for young Morgan. What will she bring to the world?
Its no coincidence she is still with us. It was all perfectly planned.

Knowing and believing that leaves me a little speechless. Not the first time this week.

Sweet Peas

I love how Longwood Garden with all its elaborate and planned out gardens has carved out a little alcove for the Sweet Pea. A long time favorite of mine, I've planted them along the fence at my parents house each May for years. Whenever I sniff them I think of the Keats' poem I happened to memorize ...

Sweet Pea (Delicate Pleasures)

"Here are sweet peas, on tip-toe for a flight With wings of gentle flusho'er delicate white, And taper fingers catching at all things To bind them all about with tiny rings." ~ Keats

It continues to tickle me pink that they have filled what could have been an empty barren passageway into this special side stage of delight! And I indulge in the sweet scents each time I have been there the last few months.

On Relaxation

How is this for stating the obvious?

"When you are always tense, tensing less is relaxed."

Profound... not my quote but it really resonated with me. So much so I felt I had to blog it ;-)

Fresh Insights

"Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this:
He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun." -- Psalm 37:5-6

Does my righteousness shine like the dawn?
What is my cause? Because God is ready to make it shine like the noonday sun!

Seems to me I have read Psalm 37 a zillion times, after all it contains every single person's most bittersweet verse:

^"4 Delight yourself in the LORD
and he will give you the desires of your heart."

Lord knows I waited a long time to see one particular desire of my heart fulfilled. I would say that my righteousness and my causes rank in there somewhere. I just can't say I have given it too much thought lately.

There are still desires both fleshly and spiritual that I still long for. These other verses really struck me with fresh revelation this week though. They have been reverberating around in my head as I wrestle items that would seek to wreck havoc with my righteousness and trust.

Tonight I was tempted to cry myself silly as I wrestled something to ground, but what will that do to my already congested head!

Instead I'll just adore rather than wrestle. Shine Jesus Shine forget any woes is mes you heard earlier from me.

Stringing Things Together

About 3 years ago I met with a woman for some counseling. She was instrumental in helping me slay some demons. One of the verses she had me focus on was Psalm 84: 7

They go from strength to strength,
till each appears before God in Zion.

We both knew I needed strength to do what I had to do. I would try to visualize what it would look like to go from strength to strength so that I could live it out.

Even after the "demon" was successful slayed there were still residual effects that had to be dealt with over time. Now, I am looking back and reflecting on what God has done in these past 3 years. I am seeing how "strength to strength" have been people. God has strung together a series of people who have offered tangible strength, wisdom & expertise.

I am abounding with wonder and thankfulness over the way God strings things together as I go from strength to strength and He works His wonders and answers my prayers.

Birds, Birds, Birds

Driving home from work last week, I noticed what looked like a lot of birds. I was amazed at the sheer number. That is until I got a good look at the sheer number. There were so many birds it was like a black ribbon in the sky stretching on for MILES. When I say miles I mean miles! I drove for a good 10 minutes and the birds just kept coming. They were coming as if they had been released from a cage -maybe a cage called winter? Then, I started driving in a different direction and I couldn't see them anymore.

I happen to tell the pastor about my amazement over the birds and he said he has seen them before. Sometimes they'll sit in the trees around his property. He agreed there are a lot of them! He thought it was ironic or rather providential that I brought this story up just before he was about to work on his sermon. He opened his PowerPoint slide to this verse Matthew 6:26:

Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?

So many birds and yet God knows them all.

I saw the birds again later that week in a completely different area. So I guess they get around. But I was drawn back to the verse the pastor brought up. In the light of some of the things I worry about why do I bother? All of those birds are in his care surely I am too...

The birds also reminded me what this blog is really all about - drawing attention to the small things that really aren't that small. Those amazing things that we get glimpses of that remind to notice what is around us because hope, glory and wonder do abound in this world.

Leftover Ramblings

We love leftovers for lunch because frequently they look like this...


That's a nice looking lunch of leftover isn't?
Hubby emailed me, "Looked so good I photographed it."

I appreciate the appreciation because I do put a lot of thought into what I will make during the week so that we can be sure to have leftovers... leftovers that hubby can enjoy and my co-workers drool over. ;-)

I made this 6-7 inch long bottom round roast last for 11 meals! We had it with pierogies and then I made stroganoff with pasta. Good stuff... I am even learning to write down the recipes that come out good.

Now if only I had a dishwasher to keep up with all my leftovers.

Together Again

In July 2006, my neighbor Charlie passed away. He was a fixture in my life. He let me use his little greenhouse to start my seeds back when my green-thumb was young and energetic. My deep love of hollyhocks started in that greenhouse -long since torn down. In the last few years of his life, you would frequently find him sitting in an old lawn chair under an oak tree. He was usually napping. It grieved me deeply when the chair was removed. I still picture it there when I drive by and remember him and then think about his wife Mary - who was still hanging in there.

Mary always knew what was going on in the neighborhood. Their porch was the place to be in the evening. I'd just go and sit for awhile or until the mosquitoes got too bad...She was always asking me, "So how's your love life?" And she really wanted to know. She really wanted the answer to be a good one. I was so happy to finally introduce her to my love while she could still appreciate the news. She's been pretty frail and went senile after Charlie passed. It wasn't something I could bare to see. I wished she could be at my wedding and to see her dance as she once promised, but she was too frail to come.

Monday, Mary passed away too. Its sad because know era is ending but it is so good to know that Charlie and Mary are back together again. Its been hard to see them apart for so long.

Abounding Thanks

Sometimes I get to bogged down by logistics and how things will work out. And sometimes I get flustered when I need to communicate with people about the logistics I am trying to work out in my life. And sometimes I get upset when the logistics I have been trying to work out aren't working out.

And then I cry a little. And sometimes I cry a lot.

Then, somehow the logistics work themselves out. So much so that they are even better than anything I could have planned. And I know its God and I wonder why I got bogged, flustered and upset.

But, I get over it choosing rather to continually bask in the better outcome and abound in thanksgiving for working out logistics in my favor and for my own good.

Everyday Food

For 4 years, I ate lunch with one fabulous cook. At least I think he was good, I only sampled a couple things over the years. He explained in detail how he made each dish and everything always looked and smelled fantastic. I was never much for recipes. I usually made things up as I went along. But thanks to my lunch buddy I acquired a respect for the recipe. He introduced me to his 2 favorite sources of recipes... Williams and Sonoma and Everyday Food. I have become a fan of both myself.

Williams and Sonoma has produced such sweet creations as pecan pie made with maple syrup and the tasty concoction percolating in the crock-pot as I type.

Everyday Food is like a box of goodies for me. When it comes in the mail, I curl up on the sofa and slowly leaf through the little magazine looking at each pictured dish trying to decide, "is that something hubby and I would like to eat?" Then, I will turn the corner of recipes I want to try. I actually tried a lot of recipes and repeated the recipes too.

The books were piling up and so I came up with a quick reference plan for looking for a favorite recipe or when I need to be inspired. I stuck a post-a-note on the back of the magazine and listed the recipes that interested me + the page number. Its been working for me.

Everyday Food is keeping us well fed.

Decorating

I have tried not to cover the house in red and green and holly. Isn't amazing how we can squeeze snowmen and candles into places we would normally not ever put stuff. All in the name of holiday decorating...

To feats of decorating success I have had this Christmas are my swag and my Tiffany bowl.

One Christmas I fell in love with this idea... I was at friends house for Christmas Eve and she had lights and glass Christmas balls hanging from an evergreen swag and they all hung over the living room windows. I have tried to duplicate her masterpiece - minus the lights because there is nowhere to plug them in. Notice the little snowman hanging on for dear life!

Last Saturday, I went to a craft show looking for something Christmasy for our coffee table. I saw a few possibilities but nothing that made me want to spend my future house money on. So I came home empty handed. But when I started decorating the next day I came up with this creation using the Tiffany bowl we received as a wedding gift + Christmas balls + a few sprigs of the tree that were cut off. And what do we have a ? a colorful bowl of found items that didn't cost me extra. Gotta love that!

To Tinsel or Not to Tinsel

Sunday we bought our first Christmas Tree together. I was more excited than Hubby... I carefully laid out all the ornaments that I would put on the tree. This is the first Christmas tree I have ever decorated all on my own and I quite liked the freedom to dress it up just as I wanted.

The results are mostly red, white and silver. I am still asking the questions though do I tinsel or not?

I hung one of my favorite ornaments. I have had since I was a baby. For the last 3 years, I have been unsure where to hang it. I planned to hang it on my roommate Christmas trees but when I thought about the fact that on Christmas Day I wouldn't see my little angel on a swing I decided to bring it back home to my parents. But now I have my own home and my own tree and I will actually be able to enjoy my little angel on Christmas Day even if it isn't on my parents tree. So here she is...

Sometime I wonder why do we go through all these trappings -Christmas trees, cookies and presents- they really don't have anything to do with Jesus' birthday. And I highly doubt that Jesus was even born on December 25th. Nevertheless there is some thing nice about the warm glow of the lights and the shiny red balls that make a drab day pretty special. Not to mention many of the ornaments hold special memories or remind me of special people.

... The question still does remain to tinsel or not to tinsel...

neverfindout.org

neverfindout.org

Quintessential Italy

This has always been one of my favorite pictures taken in Italy. I took this on my way to Mount Vesuvius.
I recently realized our new printer is also a scanner so presto scano. I can finally post it.

The woman was hanging wash and yelling down to someone walking in the street. Which to me is the quintessential Italian way! I don't think she was yelling at my for taking her picture though. I tried to be discreet.

Late Bloomer

I have always been a later bloomer. Somehow even at my age, I still keep finding areas of my life where I still haven't opened up or changed.

Recently, I was visiting a favorite creek and it was a very different experience than the last time I was there when I walked in the water in my socks. I found rest in this spot but was little a disappointed that I couldn't recreate the exhilarating romping good time I had years ago. It was a case of too tired, not enough time or extra socks.

I did catch this nice shot and it kind of reminded me of me. Seems to me, it is a late bloomer or to be more exact a late changer. Things change and some things stay the same or take longer to change that seems to be a fact of life. And everyone who knows me knows it took a long time to "change my name." I still seem to be a little green in some areas when it comes to be a wife. Sometime I look at my finger and see that wedding band and wonder "How did this happen?"
I think it will sink in eventually just as I am sure those green leaves will be changing colors.

The View

It started off as a drink of water and then grew into a flower. I was so intrigued by the view I ran for my camera and tried to recreate what I saw. I think I captured it well. I suppose it was a moment of seeing things from a different perspective and finding emerging beauty. Not only did I notice the flower but the lovely way the sun was reflecting in the water. In the end, I was glad I noticed and took the time to appreciate this wonderful glimpse.

Of New Jobs, Hard Things and Pumpkin Sorbet

New Job
Tomorrow it will be 1 month since I started my new job. It is going really well. There are definite difference but a lot of similarities too. I was well received and I like to think I jumped right in to the job. I have learned more about Excel in the last few weeks than I ever thought possible. I had no idea it could do some of the things it does and sometimes its capabilities scare me. What alarms me even more is how quick people are to say "Oh we could make an Excel spreadsheet and blah blah blah...." I am told it comes from being around so many DuPont chemical engineer types.

There is no denying that I am happy about the shorter work day and the shorter commute, but I do miss my old friends.

All in all I am happy that God has put me in this new place, I am being challenged and inspired.

Hard Things
Things like Excel can be daunting. There are plenty of other hard things I have had a hard time tackling and sometimes just been too afraid to tackle. Lately, I have found my self doing something I never thought could or would happen. And I am faced with the decision, loose hold of the wonder and amazement that I have actually mastered or overcome some hard thing or take it all for granted soon forgetting that once upon a time I couldn't do... Excel, pump my own gas and the list goes on of hard things... I am trying to hold on to that wonder - that sense of gratitude as I tackle new hard things.

Pumpkin Sorbet
Yes, its that time of year again. Time to experiment with sorbet recipes so I can try and recreate the frosty pumpkin pie without a crust I was blessed enough to partake of last fall. I have been making all kinds of sorbets this summer such as peach, plum, strawberry, and pear with Riesling. There is still no Pumpkin recipe out that satisfies me so I had to create a recipe based on a super easy peach recipe I found that doesn't require simple syrup -which is always the thing that holds me up.

Result: I am getting closer. Overall I am pleased with it but I will keep trying to perfect it.

Dancing Bride

So who knows where I have been for the last 2 months but to make up for being AWOL... have a look at this video - It might just turn your head!

Milestone Mileage

I have racked up a lot of miles in the last 3 months. So I was able to reach this Mileage Milestone a lot quicker than if I was commuting a reasonable distance to work.

It was with great excitement that I anticipated the turning of my mileage to 100,000. Really I am serious, I was like one on the edge of her seat! I had planned on you using me cell phone camera to document the event -because I forgot my camera.

Fortunately, Jeremy summer intern extraordinaire needed a ride to the mechanic. I asked him to bring his camera because by my calculations I knew we would be on route 476 when the "turn" took place. I was so thankful for his keen photography skill that caught this monumental occasion in a digital snapshot so that I can fondly look back to the day my dear Honda "Billy" turned 100,000 miles. Billy now has reached the point in its life where a $600+ timing belt is now right around the corner hence its name Billy short for "Responsibility" fulfills its name.
I am glad that not only did I have some to take the pictures but that I had someone there to celebrate with. Thanks Jeremy!

Hope on Youtube

It's amazing what you can do when you go get "help". So I have finally learned to post a youtube video! This is Marina Micalizzi and Kira Dutzmann performing at Project Dance NYC 2008 to Sara Groves' "It Might Be Hope."

I have been listening to Sara Groves for the last 2 weeks. This is the only video I found with the song I like. These 2 girls did a lovely job. (Though I have no idea who they are!) I find it somewhat ironic that they performed this 5 days before my wedding. Something I have been hoping for for a long time.

I am finding the need for hope and desire for it to be just outside my window or on the other end of the phone has not diminished now that I have a dear husband.

Our hopes change but the need for it doesn't.

P.S. Maybe now I can figure out how to post a video from the camera. You might get to see the Dancing Bride

Rumble Seats

Once upon a time we had a couple posters of antique cars hanging up in our cellar. One of them had a rumble seat. I always wanted to ride in a rumble seat. This spring I finally got the chance...

Isn't nice when these little childhood wishes come true?

Friday with Quilters

After I finally found the quilt shop I was looking for, I started to mill around looking for the piece of fabric I have pictured in my mind -a perfect shade of Robin's Egg Blue with speckles of brown.

Instead of found this lovely piece:

This might work but it is still not exactly what I am looking for. So I decided to only get a "Fat Quarter."

It was near to closing time and the shop owner and one of the workers started to pull out fabrics for a new sample quilt.

Now one of my most favorite things to do is pick out fabrics for a quilt. There is something so invigorating and artistical about pulling fabrics off shelves and out of boxes and saying: "Ohhhh yes they go together perfectly!" (And this is what I was hoping to do when I found the perfect Robin's Egg Blue)

And that's exactly what these 2 women were doing! So I subtly wiggled my way into the process and before long the 3 of use were pouring over bolts of fabric and experimenting with different ideas for the needed 6 fabrics for the quilt.

They listened to my opinion and ultimately choose 2 of the fabrics I pulled out. So I am anxious to stop by in the next week or so to see the completed project.

In the meantime, I might pull out my box fabrics and see what I have that matches my lovely blue and brown.

Since I got married...

Since I got married...

I have only made pancakes once, but I have used my new waffle maker multiple times.

I have doubled the amount of laundry I do, but I am fortunate Walter doesn't require ironed clothes for work.

I have racked up 2040 miles in 34 days driving 68 hours to and from work.

And after living in Pennsylvania for 4 years of college and almost 4 years in Wayne and Havertown, I have finally started to pump my own gas! Yes, I decided one day when I was on "E" and no where near a full service station that since I was a married woman I ought to learn to pump my own gas. And so I have.... since I got married.

Distilling Trust

I have spent much of the afternoon crafting cover letters and submitting resumes.
I could be wearing a T-Shirt that says:

“I rather be Blogging!”

I don't know where any of my applications will lead. I can tell you, I hope one will lead to a good paying job that only takes 20 minutes or less to get to rather than 60!

I am distilling what trust looks like after you get married. And I am finding that trust looks differently these days. I trust God through Walter and I trust Walter through God.

The Body of Christ ...in China

We have had Chinese University Professors visiting with us at the church. They have toured around all the historical sites while staying with Christian families and listening to lectures on Religious freedom in America and Christianity. I worked through the details of the schedule, making sure they had a place to sleep. Sure there were some snafus like I forgot to order them boxed lunches to take with them for their departure to the next city. So I ran to Wawa and ordered turkey hoagies... I got to sit in on one of the lectures with the pastor - which was really just stories of his recent experiences in China. I emailed him after everyone had left:

“I gotta tell you I was so blessed listening to what you had to say to the Chinese. It’s easy to lose sight of the big picture when you focus so much on the details: Plane departures, confirmation #s, hours in a day etc. The thought occurred to me that someday I will get to heaven and I will see the fruit of all those collective labors. I helped make your schedule so you could get to the place God planned you to be so you could plant a seed. So someday I will see the results of all the seeds planted from your seeds. So I may not be planting seeds myself but I have been getting the farmer to the field. It was good to see that with fresh eyes. The body of Christ at work….”

His response to me:

“This is what Jesus was talking about when He said that not even a cup of water given in His name will lose its reward! All of our collective efforts make His ministry here on earth possible. Every task matters. As Francis Schaeffer used to say, “There are no little people.”

So maybe it wasn't so much the pride of working for a prestigious man but the honor of working for a humble servant of God and knowing that's not my part in the body of Christ anymore that has me feeling weepy (coupled with moving away from my friends). What I do have to look forward to is all the eternal glories of all the people rescued into family of God because I helped one man get to China, France, Africa, Spain, Phoenix, Florida. And his work multiplies as each person he plants a seed with goes forward with their own new seeds.

And so I will miss being apart of something so big and glorious.

Confession, Mourning and Redemption

Last week I handed over the reigns. I will no longer be assistant to the senior pastor. I found this to be a challenging task. I guess I never realized how much I liked the power of working for a "prestigious" man. (Even though he is extremely humble.) I lost my power. I realized that I had had secret pride because of my position of power. Rarely, did I brag on my boss -but I liked the idea that I had boss I could brag on.


I repented of this pride.


Then, I started to mourn the prospect of leaving my job completely. Being uprooted from the place that has been my home, haven and occasional headache for the last 4 years. Not seeing the people who have poured into my life at work or being near to my friends and former roommates has been suffocating me.

I have been weepy for days.


I have almost always worked in a meaningful job. Either working with children in some capacity on in my present job at the church. I may end up working in a "secular" job and not able to contribute to the cause for Christ as I have been. But God has reminded me of the fact that where ever I end up working in the next few weeks or months I have a special reward waiting for me someday. And maybe my contributions will just be different in a new place.

I'll post the specific of the "redemption" separately.

Salmon Cakes

One day my old roommates were busy in the kitchen mixing up a bowlful of pink meat. "What are you making?" "Salmon cakes. Do you want one?" one said. "Sure I'll try one." I replied and proceeded to eat the most delectable seafood dish ever! It was like a little piece of heaven in my mouth! They quickly came the house favorite and the "one" dish I could rely one to make for company.

But salmon in a pouch (that's what we used) is not that cheap. Walter and I wanted to make up a batch for lunches this week. We saw that the canned salmon was on sale half the price for twice the amount of meat in a pouch. SO we bought 4 cans!

I opened one can and it was all watery and then I saw its spine and I about hurled. This explains the tapered shape of the can. This also explains what the can means when its says "Traditional Style." They cut up a fish and stick the whole slice of fish in a can! I was completely grossed out. Walter had to pick out the bones. We now have a ton of them in the frig. but the joy of eating them has been diminished by the intimate knowledge we had of the fish before he got crumbled up and mixed in with eggs and mayo.

I'm happy to post the recipe if someone asks... just whatever you do buy the salmon in a pouch unless you have a thing for fish bones...
It may be a while before I feel an urge to make them again