I not sure what happened to April. I don't think I successful read any books. I just finished a book last night so I will share some thoughts on it while it is fresh in my mind.
No They Can't: Why Government Fails but Individuals Succeed by John Stossel
So I have to go on the record and say I have always liked John Stossel. You might even say I have had a crush on him. He was the man going against the flow and speaking his mind amidst typical media people who kind of acted like he is the crazy fellow they should try to hush hush. "Ah yes that's nice, good reporting but we don't really buy it." That is the impression I always got from Barbara Walters and Hugh Downs from their show 20/20.
That could be why I liked him. What he said made sense, and he sounded like my dad.
Having been without a TV or cable for almost 2 years I had no idea Stossel was no longer with 20/20. He now works for Fox News and has his own show there. It sounds as though he is really happy with his environment. No unions to worry about, no co-workers blatantly poo, pooing him, no higher ups saying you can't do this or say that. He has some freedom and that's is what a Libertarian like him really wants.
I have heard the term Libertarian before but I never really delved into what exactly that looks like. Presidential candidate Ron Paul is really a Libertarian running as Republican and during debates much of what he said sounded sensible but some sounded a little unnerving. After reading, No They Can't I definitely understand what Ron Paul is driving at and what Libertarians want. They want freedom. They actually want more freedom than a conservative like myself wants - which surprised me.
Libertarians want bare bones Federal government, they want the government to just do the things the Constitution lays out for them, postal system, defense, coining money and handful of other things. The list does not include providing housing, arts, NPR, subsidies for trains, farm and everything else that can't survive on its own, education, nation building in other countries, or healthcare. Some of this stuff is the state's responsibility and some of it yours or mine - the individual.
He made such good points about why everything the government touches ends up wasted, more expensive, failing and not the best that it could be. But if it were left up to individuals who are more motivated to come up with a better, more efficient and more cost effective way to do it things would be so much better - like our tax bills and our nation's deficit!
He touches on "Green" energy, chemicals in foods, education system, drugs, the cost of wars.
I don't like to hear talk of cutting defense spending because after all that's one of the few things Federal Government is supposed to do, but John cites case after case of flagrant, disgusting waste of our tax dollars that it almost makes me think the government needs a bunch of stay at home moms trying to survive on 1 salary to get a hold of the budget and tackle it like a woman crazy with nesting and due any day.
Case in point: "Uncle Sam" sent over 12 Billion in $100 bills to Iraq - no one can tell you where that money has gone. Vanished. That pisses me off.
Government run Education was a good chapter as well. Not really anything I haven't heard before thanks to Waiting for Superman and having worked in public schools for several years. We dump tax money into public schools and they still fail. No amount of money is going to fix the failing schools or children until administration can fire bad or poor performing teachers and give raises to the exceptional teachers. Blame the teacher's union for that one. Warm bodies who pay dues is all they care about, not providing our kids with the best teachers. Believe me I have seen those teachers who should have been kicked to the curb. Instead they were coddled and moved around so they poor abilities effected less kids. Or they just stayed put and made more kids cry year after year.
Entitlements- The whole Social Security / Medicare thing is just a mess and the unsustainability will crush us.
Here is a quote that really got me, " Few of us realize, though, that most of us get back up to three times what we paid in, (SS&Medi.) and that our selfish sense of entitlement will ruin America much faster than foreign aid, subsidies for NPR, or foreign wars ever will." (p. 283) Did you hear that Baby Boomers!?
As a Libertarian, Stossel believes illegal drugs should be legal. True
freedom gives the adult the opportunity to smoke pot if they want to or
need it to combat chemotherapy side effects. Seeing these things
legalized -as conservative and a Christian- aren't so good in my eyes
and yet he made valid points to support his stance. He is pretty convincing...
Libertarians want freedom, that translates into free trade, capitalism, and letting the market make the necessary changes to protect people, and make them prosperous and keeping Government out. If this country did it with gusto no one could stop us! We will need to do something soon though because the American taxpayer can't keep up with the spending. Bankruptcy - it isn't a matter of if it is a matter of when.
I'll tell you, understanding the mind of a Libertarian will force me to look at the issues with a fresh perspective. How much freedom do I really want?
So get out to the library or your bookstore of choice and check this book out. What's really nice about the lay out is its broken down into bite-size pieces lasting a page or 2 as he looks at "What Intuition Tempts Us to Believe" and "What Reality Taught Me" making it a good book for busy people!
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Friday, May 25, 2012
Home Economists
I have been home with my son for nearly 2 years now. Some time in August - Lord Willing- we will have a new bundle. With another child comes a potentially tighter budget and I am glad that over the last 2 years, I have learned how to stretch dollars and seek out the good deals. In this ever struggling economy, dollars may need to be stretched even more.
I have learned a lot following the blog Money Saving Mom : Helping You Become a Better Home Economist I like the term "home economist". As moms, specifically stay at home moms we sometimes have our finger on the pulse of the economy better than anyone else. We know the cost of food, electric, kids clothes, and gas. We also know that the prices are all going up or are much too high for many of our one salary budgets. We also know that our work is never done. If our baby wakes up in the middle of night we get up, if we have to cut costs we make another sacrifice or have a yardsale. We work hard and it is often overlooked by just about all walks of life -even Democratic strategists like Hilary Rosen. She said in April, creating a small firestorm, that Ann Romney, (potential 1st Lady) who raised five sons, had "never worked a day in her life."
What a slap in the face of most moms. As if being a mom, in this case a stay at home mom, is not work.. Ann Romney has worked hard anyone who has a son or has seen boys play knows that! Hilary's statement is ignorant and assumptive as well as offensive to the women working at home. She assumes that the Romneys have always had money and never struggled, assumes that being a stay at home mom is not real work, assumes that being a working mom or a woman in the workforce is real work. She assumes that real work is the only way a woman has the credibility to have any kind of say about economics.
Hilary said this because Mitt Romney talks to his wife and she tells him what she is hearing from women these days about the economy. Hilary assumes that a rich stay at home mom has no room to talk on such issues. I wonder if Hilary Rosen would have the nerve to say it to me? What does this stay at home mom know about the economy, probably just as much as Ann Romney! One only has to over hear a conversation in passing, read a blog, talk to a neighbor, watch a youtube video or listen to talk radio and you get a good reading on the state of the economy and how families are struggling.
Sure Hilary apologized to Ann but I still can't help but think that Hilary and people like her think that when you leave the work force to raise your children you leave your brain, background knowledge and opinions behind. Life as a Stay at Home Mom isn't just dishes and singing the Wheels on Bus. No one is living in the trenches more than the home economist. We are the ones clipping coupons, scouring grocery circulars, carrying calculators in our purse/diaper bags, following blogs that highlight the best deals. We go without cable. We buy our kids clothes are resales and yardsales, We drive old cars. We drive less because gas is so high. We make sacrifices because our kids are worth it. I dare say some of us talk to politicians and their wives about how tough things are!
This burgeoning home economist has learned more about the economy, frugality and budgeting in my 2 years working at home than in all my years in the workforce. Besides reading blogs, I've watched youtube videos of Milton Friedman (the economist) with my husband, I listen to talk radio all afternoon, and I read. All very good reasons for me to be offended when a woman like Hilary Rosen implies that stay at home moms aren't really working and that we don't have any credible experience or opinions to speak on economy.
I have learned a lot following the blog Money Saving Mom : Helping You Become a Better Home Economist I like the term "home economist". As moms, specifically stay at home moms we sometimes have our finger on the pulse of the economy better than anyone else. We know the cost of food, electric, kids clothes, and gas. We also know that the prices are all going up or are much too high for many of our one salary budgets. We also know that our work is never done. If our baby wakes up in the middle of night we get up, if we have to cut costs we make another sacrifice or have a yardsale. We work hard and it is often overlooked by just about all walks of life -even Democratic strategists like Hilary Rosen. She said in April, creating a small firestorm, that Ann Romney, (potential 1st Lady) who raised five sons, had "never worked a day in her life."
What a slap in the face of most moms. As if being a mom, in this case a stay at home mom, is not work.. Ann Romney has worked hard anyone who has a son or has seen boys play knows that! Hilary's statement is ignorant and assumptive as well as offensive to the women working at home. She assumes that the Romneys have always had money and never struggled, assumes that being a stay at home mom is not real work, assumes that being a working mom or a woman in the workforce is real work. She assumes that real work is the only way a woman has the credibility to have any kind of say about economics.
Hilary said this because Mitt Romney talks to his wife and she tells him what she is hearing from women these days about the economy. Hilary assumes that a rich stay at home mom has no room to talk on such issues. I wonder if Hilary Rosen would have the nerve to say it to me? What does this stay at home mom know about the economy, probably just as much as Ann Romney! One only has to over hear a conversation in passing, read a blog, talk to a neighbor, watch a youtube video or listen to talk radio and you get a good reading on the state of the economy and how families are struggling.
Sure Hilary apologized to Ann but I still can't help but think that Hilary and people like her think that when you leave the work force to raise your children you leave your brain, background knowledge and opinions behind. Life as a Stay at Home Mom isn't just dishes and singing the Wheels on Bus. No one is living in the trenches more than the home economist. We are the ones clipping coupons, scouring grocery circulars, carrying calculators in our purse/diaper bags, following blogs that highlight the best deals. We go without cable. We buy our kids clothes are resales and yardsales, We drive old cars. We drive less because gas is so high. We make sacrifices because our kids are worth it. I dare say some of us talk to politicians and their wives about how tough things are!
This burgeoning home economist has learned more about the economy, frugality and budgeting in my 2 years working at home than in all my years in the workforce. Besides reading blogs, I've watched youtube videos of Milton Friedman (the economist) with my husband, I listen to talk radio all afternoon, and I read. All very good reasons for me to be offended when a woman like Hilary Rosen implies that stay at home moms aren't really working and that we don't have any credible experience or opinions to speak on economy.
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Lost Teachable Moments
When I was teaching, I loved to take advantage of the teachable moment. You know those unplanned moments when you get a chance to explain something or learn something that you hadn't planned. I do endeavor to teach my son as we go about the day, even though it may be something over his head right now. I tell him anyway because you never know what will stick. Someday something might click quicker as he remembers momma saying something about x,y,z.
I really can't imagine people not wanting to be involved in a teachable moment when they have a chance to share their knowledge or passion about a hobby etc.
It does seem to happen a little too often to me. One recent missed teachable moment took place at Longwood Gardens when I had the chance to meet up with Brandy (Hi Brandy :-) It was a beautiful day and all the photographers were out. There was one woman who had an old fashioned camera - the kind you put your head under a drape and I think capture the photo on a glass panel. I don't know for sure because when I asked a question, as we were walking by not only did she not answer my question she said something really rude. Actually something rude directed to my little boy. I was utterly shocked. Shocked by the rudeness but also by someone not wanting to take advantage of the teachable moment to share about something they are passionate about. I can only assume she was passionate about it. I mean how many people do you see walking around with old fashioned cameras unless its something they enjoy. Clearly sharing that enjoyment doesn't bring her joy though. That is the only explanation I could come up with for her rudeness.
Brandy and I walked on looking at each other in utter disbelief at the rudeness and the missed opportunity to learn something new.
I really can't imagine people not wanting to be involved in a teachable moment when they have a chance to share their knowledge or passion about a hobby etc.
It does seem to happen a little too often to me. One recent missed teachable moment took place at Longwood Gardens when I had the chance to meet up with Brandy (Hi Brandy :-) It was a beautiful day and all the photographers were out. There was one woman who had an old fashioned camera - the kind you put your head under a drape and I think capture the photo on a glass panel. I don't know for sure because when I asked a question, as we were walking by not only did she not answer my question she said something really rude. Actually something rude directed to my little boy. I was utterly shocked. Shocked by the rudeness but also by someone not wanting to take advantage of the teachable moment to share about something they are passionate about. I can only assume she was passionate about it. I mean how many people do you see walking around with old fashioned cameras unless its something they enjoy. Clearly sharing that enjoyment doesn't bring her joy though. That is the only explanation I could come up with for her rudeness.
Brandy and I walked on looking at each other in utter disbelief at the rudeness and the missed opportunity to learn something new.
Sunday, April 22, 2012
In the Thick of Things
In the thick of things. It is not always the best place to be. Nor is it the best place to watch someone you love be...
In the thick of small town political drama.
In the thick of singleness.
In the thick of infertility issues.
In the thick of health issues.
In the thick of running a business in a struggling over-regulated economy.
It isn't a pretty sight sometimes - most times.
It leaves me wondering what more can I do? The best thing I can do is pray and yet this simplistic action feels like the hardest thing. It would be so much more satisfying to write a letter to the editor. However, stirring the pot isn't always the best course of action either - for so many reasons.
So I must find myself deep in the thick of prayer because I know this is the best course of action if I am to offer any help or comfort to those who are caught in the thick of something messy or painful or disappointing.
In the thick of small town political drama.
In the thick of singleness.
In the thick of infertility issues.
In the thick of health issues.
In the thick of running a business in a struggling over-regulated economy.
It isn't a pretty sight sometimes - most times.
It leaves me wondering what more can I do? The best thing I can do is pray and yet this simplistic action feels like the hardest thing. It would be so much more satisfying to write a letter to the editor. However, stirring the pot isn't always the best course of action either - for so many reasons.
So I must find myself deep in the thick of prayer because I know this is the best course of action if I am to offer any help or comfort to those who are caught in the thick of something messy or painful or disappointing.
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Titantic Greetings
One of my favorite scenes from the iconic John Cameron movie "Titantic" is the last scene when Rose is finally reunited with Jack and she is welcomed "home" by all those vibrant characters who didn't survive the icy waters. All those men, women and children who didn't get to lead full lives like we see Rose did by the pictures she had displayed by her bed. She lived a full life for them -her heart went on.
You can watch it here:
Maybe its a romanticized version of stepping from the life we now know into the eternal life beyond us. I do like to think that when people pass on they are greeted by all those that went before. I don't know if there is any theological validity to it but when my brother passed away 15 years ago it was comforting to me to think perhaps he was welcomed home by our great grandparents. When my grandpop passed away this summer I was comforted thinking of all the people who might be waiting to welcome him home - like my brother and grandpop's parents, and Rudy, "Wacko", Fred, and Uncle Don and the men he fought with in WWII and all the ones he has said goodbye to over the years.
On February 3rd and 4th, two of my grandpop's very good friends passed away. I couldn't help but think that these 2 veterans were greeted by my Pop as they answered the final call. Perhaps it was a Titanic greeting with a room full of friends, relatives and comrades. Comrades who are glad that they lived such full and good lives.
Then, of course instead of Jack being at the top of the staircase - its Jesus...
You can watch it here:
Maybe its a romanticized version of stepping from the life we now know into the eternal life beyond us. I do like to think that when people pass on they are greeted by all those that went before. I don't know if there is any theological validity to it but when my brother passed away 15 years ago it was comforting to me to think perhaps he was welcomed home by our great grandparents. When my grandpop passed away this summer I was comforted thinking of all the people who might be waiting to welcome him home - like my brother and grandpop's parents, and Rudy, "Wacko", Fred, and Uncle Don and the men he fought with in WWII and all the ones he has said goodbye to over the years.
On February 3rd and 4th, two of my grandpop's very good friends passed away. I couldn't help but think that these 2 veterans were greeted by my Pop as they answered the final call. Perhaps it was a Titanic greeting with a room full of friends, relatives and comrades. Comrades who are glad that they lived such full and good lives.
Then, of course instead of Jack being at the top of the staircase - its Jesus...
Wednesday, April 04, 2012
Read-A-Thon (March)
I had heard about Unbroken from my friend MaryAnn she told me at one point she was number 95 on the waiting list for this book at her library! I didn't have to wait that long.
Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival, Resilience, and Redemption
By Laura Hillenbrand
This book was a page turner for me. I felt like I was with Louie Zamperini (the subject in the book) when he was running, floating on a raft in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, and a P.O.W. in Japan. Not a pretty time for him but he survived against all odds because God's hand was on him protecting him and saving him for the life that was planned for him. It was such a great book because of his life of overcoming odds and also an excellent look into World War II and the horrors our grandfathers lived through or died from. It was such a different look at the war compared to A Pictorial History of the World War 1I Years by Edward Jablonski. This is because Unbroken is about a real guy, someone my grandpop might have come across or served with. Whereas the pictorial history was very general, with astounding statistics and mind numbing fatality numbers. Unbroken put names and faces with those staggering numbers.
Louis Zamperini has his own book Devil at my Heels which I have added to my list of books to read. I am curious to see the difference in style.
Scorpions for Breakfast: My Fight Against Special Interests, Liberal Media, and Cynical Politicos to Secure America's Border By Arizona Governor Jan Brewer
I heard about this book the day President Obama snubbed Gov. Jan Brewer on the tarmac. I heard her book went through the roof on Amazon.com that week. I picked mine up at the library.
If you want to watch some of aftershocks of their run in watch this video:
As is often the case, there is always more to the story than the media gives you. No one wants to be considered a racist. Except maybe real racists -they don't care who knows. This book chronicles Gov. Brewer attempt to pass a law that helps enforce existing U.S. Immigration laws that aren't being enforced by the Federal Government. Time and again Gov. Brewer reiterated that she is not a racist, she believes in the rule of law. We have laws that should be enforced for the safety of all; for the fairness of all. By the Obama Administration's inaction to enforce the laws on the books it would seem they don't care so much about the danger of drugs cartels, gangs, smugglers and the financial drain on the people of Arizona dealing with an influx of crime and people in need of services & education. In fact, the President sued the Governor to keep the law from going into effect.
It is funny, the term "illegal alien" seems to have lost its affect. It is means someone is breaking our laws. As a result, people who are breaking our laws are also taking government services from legitimate citizens both those natural born and those who lawfully went through the naturalization process.
Lawlessness is costing taxpayers millions & billions of dollars, which I knew going into the book. I kind of thought this book would be a little bit like "preaching to the choir" however, I really learned a great deal about the issues and how there is more to this than meets the eye. It is definitely a good read especially if you are on the fence about immigration or want to be able to refute arguments posed to you about immigration -around the water cooler.
I admit I have found myself grumbling when at the store and I see someone who is "probably" an illegal alien using a SNAP card or WIC payments and I look in my wallet and know I couldn't get everything I wanted to today. I know I need to guard my heart so my frustration stays on the lawlessness and not the person in front of me.
Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival, Resilience, and Redemption
By Laura Hillenbrand
This book was a page turner for me. I felt like I was with Louie Zamperini (the subject in the book) when he was running, floating on a raft in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, and a P.O.W. in Japan. Not a pretty time for him but he survived against all odds because God's hand was on him protecting him and saving him for the life that was planned for him. It was such a great book because of his life of overcoming odds and also an excellent look into World War II and the horrors our grandfathers lived through or died from. It was such a different look at the war compared to A Pictorial History of the World War 1I Years by Edward Jablonski. This is because Unbroken is about a real guy, someone my grandpop might have come across or served with. Whereas the pictorial history was very general, with astounding statistics and mind numbing fatality numbers. Unbroken put names and faces with those staggering numbers.
Louis Zamperini has his own book Devil at my Heels which I have added to my list of books to read. I am curious to see the difference in style.
Scorpions for Breakfast: My Fight Against Special Interests, Liberal Media, and Cynical Politicos to Secure America's Border By Arizona Governor Jan Brewer
I heard about this book the day President Obama snubbed Gov. Jan Brewer on the tarmac. I heard her book went through the roof on Amazon.com that week. I picked mine up at the library.
If you want to watch some of aftershocks of their run in watch this video:
As is often the case, there is always more to the story than the media gives you. No one wants to be considered a racist. Except maybe real racists -they don't care who knows. This book chronicles Gov. Brewer attempt to pass a law that helps enforce existing U.S. Immigration laws that aren't being enforced by the Federal Government. Time and again Gov. Brewer reiterated that she is not a racist, she believes in the rule of law. We have laws that should be enforced for the safety of all; for the fairness of all. By the Obama Administration's inaction to enforce the laws on the books it would seem they don't care so much about the danger of drugs cartels, gangs, smugglers and the financial drain on the people of Arizona dealing with an influx of crime and people in need of services & education. In fact, the President sued the Governor to keep the law from going into effect.
It is funny, the term "illegal alien" seems to have lost its affect. It is means someone is breaking our laws. As a result, people who are breaking our laws are also taking government services from legitimate citizens both those natural born and those who lawfully went through the naturalization process.
Lawlessness is costing taxpayers millions & billions of dollars, which I knew going into the book. I kind of thought this book would be a little bit like "preaching to the choir" however, I really learned a great deal about the issues and how there is more to this than meets the eye. It is definitely a good read especially if you are on the fence about immigration or want to be able to refute arguments posed to you about immigration -around the water cooler.
I admit I have found myself grumbling when at the store and I see someone who is "probably" an illegal alien using a SNAP card or WIC payments and I look in my wallet and know I couldn't get everything I wanted to today. I know I need to guard my heart so my frustration stays on the lawlessness and not the person in front of me.
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
Lily and Bill - Back Together Again
Part of my daily routine is to check out the local obituaries. Yesterday, I saw a familiar name- Bill V. Years, ago when I was still single I interviewed Bill and his wife Lily (also my cousin.)
In honor of the fact that Bill has be reunited with his beautiful Lily, I am re-posting the article I wrote about them years ago. I've not reedited. .
My aunt was telling me about Lily and Bill’s anniversary party. I was intrigued.
I thought of Lily, a beautiful older woman and distant cousin. At least once a year, I would see her at the St. Michael’s Celebration, serving porkette and roast beef sandwiches. I asked my aunt how long have they been married. She said, “25 years.” My mouth dropped. “How can that be? She has to be in her 70s.”
I started to do the math. If they celebrated their 25th anniversary in 2001 that means they got married in the 1976. If she was 50 in 1976 that means she was 25 in 1951. I thought to myself, “What was it like to be a twenty-something single woman in the 1950s?” My understanding of the 50s was everyone got married. It was not like today where a woman can choose a career over marriage and not be called an “Old Maid”. I decided I must talk to Lily and Bill to see what wisdom they can offer single people.
Lily is a woman with a sweet spirit about her and at 76 she is still beautiful. Bill is an energetic fellow who wakes up singing. This is their story.
Gibbstown Swim Club 1976, sitting on opposite sides of the pool Lily noticed a man with crossed legs and nice calves. Curious, she asked a friend sitting next to her about him. Gibbstown is full of family relations and everyone knows mostly everyone else, yet she had never met Bill. Maybe because he was a teacher in Pitman about 20 minutes away and he spent most of his summers on his boat in Cape May. However, that day mutual friends introduced Bill to Lily. They had come to watch their niece and nephew swim but they found love. Less than four weeks later, they were married. Lily was 50; Bill was 47 neither had ever been married.
Bill never had any inclination to marry. He was perfectly content teaching, coaching and boating. Never gave marriage a thought, until he met Lily. “It was love at first sight”, he said. They were the talk of the town when three weeks later they got married in her mother’s house. They figured, “we’re older and don’t need a long engagement.” They had found love, so why wait. The thing is it really came when they least expected it. It was not after years of relentless, frustrated searching.
Not having any desire to marry really puts you in a position to find it when you least expect it. Not living life consumed with finding a mate or depressed because you can’t find one also puts you in a very good position to find love when you least expect it. You are honestly living life without the expectation. Not like some of us who say, “Oh I know I won’t meet Mr. Right tonight.” Still you look around for him and go home a little bummed because you really didn’t find him tonight.
I was a little surprised to find out that being single didn’t bother them. I thought Lily might tell me that it was a terrible struggle of surrendering her will to God and learning to wait. She never had to go through the labyrinth of surrender. She had always been there. I wish I could say the same for myself. Too bad surrendering isn’t a gene to be passed along in family DNA; I would like having that gene.
If I could bottle their attitude toward singleness and sell it, I could become a very wealthy woman. Their single years contain nuggets of wisdom we could learn a lot from. We can’t bottle attitudes; we are left to change our own through the grace of God. Some of us desperately need a new attitude in regards to our single life. They have the life experience and credibility that we can trust. They have room to talk. Do we have the good sense to listen?
Lily could have married earlier. She ran into some of the same men we have. Believe it or not there were men in the 50s who were only interested in sex too. She wouldn’t give into that. She was choosy she didn’t date just anyone. Though she may have been considered an “old maid” she never felt that is what people thought of her. She didn’t pine for a husband because she was happy where she was. That is were I want to be, so happy with life that I don’t even notice I am single.
Both Lily and Bill found satisfaction working and traveling. She was active in politics and the St. Michael’s Club. He spent his summers boating. Both were involved with the family as they still are. She had a loving, fun family that fulfilled her. She invested time with her nieces and nephews and this made her happy. He invested time in his students and this fulfilled him. He still has former students coming up to him.
Lily mentioned, “swim meets are boring”, but it was important that she support her niece. It was in doing the valuable, but boring tasks that she met the right man at the right time. Like Rebecca gathering water at the well, a valuable but boring task that provided her with a loving husband. (Genesis 24)
They both told me, “When you least expect it will happen.” Coming from anybody else its like fingernails on a chalkboard, but from them it is truth. They lived it. They lived life to the fullest and then their cup overflowed. “The last 25 years have been the best years of my life,” Bill said, “I wouldn’t trade a day.” Such statements from a tremendous couple give me hope.
You can’t walk away from Lily and Bill and not learn some valuable lessons.
Do what makes you happy.
Go out meet people make friends.
Invest time in your family and friends.
Don’t live life looking because it really does happen when you least expect it.
This is where I wish I could sell, “Lily and Bill’s Healthy Single Attitude” in a bottle because I know a lot of people will say, “Yeah, easier said than done.”
Capture this final picture. It’s true they never longed to be married like some of us. They just did what made them happy. Then one day in the midst of doing what made them happy they met and fell in love. Now if you want that, if you really want to hear, “These years with you have been the best years of my life...” Are you willing to live life to the fullest? Are you willing to catch hold of that attitude of not stressing over biological clocks or calendars with no dates penciled in and just live and do what makes you happy? That’s where I want to be found, living life to the fullest.
No matter how old I get before he comes along, hope stays alive because Lily and Bill. Sometimes love comes later but it comes… when we least expect it.
Epilogue:
It’s been more than five years since I sat with Lily and Bill at their dining room table and they shared with me how they met and got married. Today, February 6, 2006 I went to Lily’s viewing. After a number of years battling cancer she is at peace. As I walked into the church there was a collage of pictures of Lily with family members and friends. In the center of it all was their wedding picture.
As I looked at this still beautiful woman lying at rest I couldn’t help but say, “If you can hear me Lily perhaps you might ask God if he could hurry up my husband for me. I am 5 years older now too and I am not so sure I can be as patient as you were.” Theologically it’s not sound I know but sometimes you can’t help yourself. And then I saw Bill, “I am going to miss that girl. I never would of have thought I would have found someone as wonderful as her at my age… we had 30 good years together. The best 30 years of my life.”
Their story will live on… still giving me hope.
In honor of the fact that Bill has be reunited with his beautiful Lily, I am re-posting the article I wrote about them years ago. I've not reedited. .
Does Love Really Come When You Least Expect It?
Lily and Bill
My aunt was telling me about Lily and Bill’s anniversary party. I was intrigued.
I thought of Lily, a beautiful older woman and distant cousin. At least once a year, I would see her at the St. Michael’s Celebration, serving porkette and roast beef sandwiches. I asked my aunt how long have they been married. She said, “25 years.” My mouth dropped. “How can that be? She has to be in her 70s.”
I started to do the math. If they celebrated their 25th anniversary in 2001 that means they got married in the 1976. If she was 50 in 1976 that means she was 25 in 1951. I thought to myself, “What was it like to be a twenty-something single woman in the 1950s?” My understanding of the 50s was everyone got married. It was not like today where a woman can choose a career over marriage and not be called an “Old Maid”. I decided I must talk to Lily and Bill to see what wisdom they can offer single people.
Lily is a woman with a sweet spirit about her and at 76 she is still beautiful. Bill is an energetic fellow who wakes up singing. This is their story.
Gibbstown Swim Club 1976, sitting on opposite sides of the pool Lily noticed a man with crossed legs and nice calves. Curious, she asked a friend sitting next to her about him. Gibbstown is full of family relations and everyone knows mostly everyone else, yet she had never met Bill. Maybe because he was a teacher in Pitman about 20 minutes away and he spent most of his summers on his boat in Cape May. However, that day mutual friends introduced Bill to Lily. They had come to watch their niece and nephew swim but they found love. Less than four weeks later, they were married. Lily was 50; Bill was 47 neither had ever been married.
Bill never had any inclination to marry. He was perfectly content teaching, coaching and boating. Never gave marriage a thought, until he met Lily. “It was love at first sight”, he said. They were the talk of the town when three weeks later they got married in her mother’s house. They figured, “we’re older and don’t need a long engagement.” They had found love, so why wait. The thing is it really came when they least expected it. It was not after years of relentless, frustrated searching.
Not having any desire to marry really puts you in a position to find it when you least expect it. Not living life consumed with finding a mate or depressed because you can’t find one also puts you in a very good position to find love when you least expect it. You are honestly living life without the expectation. Not like some of us who say, “Oh I know I won’t meet Mr. Right tonight.” Still you look around for him and go home a little bummed because you really didn’t find him tonight.
I was a little surprised to find out that being single didn’t bother them. I thought Lily might tell me that it was a terrible struggle of surrendering her will to God and learning to wait. She never had to go through the labyrinth of surrender. She had always been there. I wish I could say the same for myself. Too bad surrendering isn’t a gene to be passed along in family DNA; I would like having that gene.
If I could bottle their attitude toward singleness and sell it, I could become a very wealthy woman. Their single years contain nuggets of wisdom we could learn a lot from. We can’t bottle attitudes; we are left to change our own through the grace of God. Some of us desperately need a new attitude in regards to our single life. They have the life experience and credibility that we can trust. They have room to talk. Do we have the good sense to listen?
Lily could have married earlier. She ran into some of the same men we have. Believe it or not there were men in the 50s who were only interested in sex too. She wouldn’t give into that. She was choosy she didn’t date just anyone. Though she may have been considered an “old maid” she never felt that is what people thought of her. She didn’t pine for a husband because she was happy where she was. That is were I want to be, so happy with life that I don’t even notice I am single.
Both Lily and Bill found satisfaction working and traveling. She was active in politics and the St. Michael’s Club. He spent his summers boating. Both were involved with the family as they still are. She had a loving, fun family that fulfilled her. She invested time with her nieces and nephews and this made her happy. He invested time in his students and this fulfilled him. He still has former students coming up to him.
Lily mentioned, “swim meets are boring”, but it was important that she support her niece. It was in doing the valuable, but boring tasks that she met the right man at the right time. Like Rebecca gathering water at the well, a valuable but boring task that provided her with a loving husband. (Genesis 24)
They both told me, “When you least expect it will happen.” Coming from anybody else its like fingernails on a chalkboard, but from them it is truth. They lived it. They lived life to the fullest and then their cup overflowed. “The last 25 years have been the best years of my life,” Bill said, “I wouldn’t trade a day.” Such statements from a tremendous couple give me hope.
You can’t walk away from Lily and Bill and not learn some valuable lessons.
Do what makes you happy.
Go out meet people make friends.
Invest time in your family and friends.
Don’t live life looking because it really does happen when you least expect it.
This is where I wish I could sell, “Lily and Bill’s Healthy Single Attitude” in a bottle because I know a lot of people will say, “Yeah, easier said than done.”
Capture this final picture. It’s true they never longed to be married like some of us. They just did what made them happy. Then one day in the midst of doing what made them happy they met and fell in love. Now if you want that, if you really want to hear, “These years with you have been the best years of my life...” Are you willing to live life to the fullest? Are you willing to catch hold of that attitude of not stressing over biological clocks or calendars with no dates penciled in and just live and do what makes you happy? That’s where I want to be found, living life to the fullest.
No matter how old I get before he comes along, hope stays alive because Lily and Bill. Sometimes love comes later but it comes… when we least expect it.
Epilogue:
It’s been more than five years since I sat with Lily and Bill at their dining room table and they shared with me how they met and got married. Today, February 6, 2006 I went to Lily’s viewing. After a number of years battling cancer she is at peace. As I walked into the church there was a collage of pictures of Lily with family members and friends. In the center of it all was their wedding picture.
As I looked at this still beautiful woman lying at rest I couldn’t help but say, “If you can hear me Lily perhaps you might ask God if he could hurry up my husband for me. I am 5 years older now too and I am not so sure I can be as patient as you were.” Theologically it’s not sound I know but sometimes you can’t help yourself. And then I saw Bill, “I am going to miss that girl. I never would of have thought I would have found someone as wonderful as her at my age… we had 30 good years together. The best 30 years of my life.”
Their story will live on… still giving me hope.
Monday, March 19, 2012
Sometimes...
... doing the right thing looks a little risky.
I noticed this old lady standing on the corner. She was dressed for winter though it is quite warm out. Dressed to the nines too. As I stopped at the corner, she walked up to the car and asked if I could give her a ride to the Giant grocery store. The bus had come early and so she missed it and the next one wasn't for an hour. She spoke with an Italian accent. She is 90 if she is a day and is smaller than me so I figured if she tried anything I could take her right?! In today's day and age, saying yes to helpless people has become a hard thing to risk and that is sad. I felt it was the right thing to do so I let her in. Here it turns out she is from the Abruzzi region in Italy and was astounded to hear that my family was Ascoli Piceno. Veritable neighbors. She was sweet and appreciated my help.
She made me think of my great grandparents, Luigi & Giulia. They came to Ellis Island over 90 years ago. They arrived in Gibbstown in February. Great Grandmom Giulia was midway through a pregnancy that resulted in my grandpop. She gets off the train and all she sees is cinder block houses and nothing special. Grandpop told me she was so "disappointed." Still they would probably agree with me that sometimes doing the right thing looks a little risky. Like boarding a ship to cross the Atlantic while your are pregnant. Like leaving your home to try and make a new home in a far off place. They did it though. Gibbstown was nothing special compared to the history and beauty contained in the city limits of Ascoli Piceno.
Perhaps the reward of doing the risky right thing is that something special can come out of it.
Over time Gibbstown became more special because they were there. They produced 3 children who all contributed to making the town something special, from the trees they planted to the people they interacted with on a daily basis to the organizations they helped found and run. They are and were special to the people of the town. Pillars. People who are pillars can sometime even outlast ancient Roman pillars found in old cities.
I noticed this old lady standing on the corner. She was dressed for winter though it is quite warm out. Dressed to the nines too. As I stopped at the corner, she walked up to the car and asked if I could give her a ride to the Giant grocery store. The bus had come early and so she missed it and the next one wasn't for an hour. She spoke with an Italian accent. She is 90 if she is a day and is smaller than me so I figured if she tried anything I could take her right?! In today's day and age, saying yes to helpless people has become a hard thing to risk and that is sad. I felt it was the right thing to do so I let her in. Here it turns out she is from the Abruzzi region in Italy and was astounded to hear that my family was Ascoli Piceno. Veritable neighbors. She was sweet and appreciated my help.
She made me think of my great grandparents, Luigi & Giulia. They came to Ellis Island over 90 years ago. They arrived in Gibbstown in February. Great Grandmom Giulia was midway through a pregnancy that resulted in my grandpop. She gets off the train and all she sees is cinder block houses and nothing special. Grandpop told me she was so "disappointed." Still they would probably agree with me that sometimes doing the right thing looks a little risky. Like boarding a ship to cross the Atlantic while your are pregnant. Like leaving your home to try and make a new home in a far off place. They did it though. Gibbstown was nothing special compared to the history and beauty contained in the city limits of Ascoli Piceno.
Perhaps the reward of doing the risky right thing is that something special can come out of it.
Over time Gibbstown became more special because they were there. They produced 3 children who all contributed to making the town something special, from the trees they planted to the people they interacted with on a daily basis to the organizations they helped found and run. They are and were special to the people of the town. Pillars. People who are pillars can sometime even outlast ancient Roman pillars found in old cities.
Wednesday, March 07, 2012
Read-A-Thon (January & February)
I always enjoyed doing the M.S. Read-A-Thon during my grammar school days. I liked reading in general. I still do, I just haven't been taking or making the time as I said in earlier posts. That's all changing I have read more books in the first 2 months of 2012 than I read in all over 2011. I actually feel smarter!
Here is the list and little highlight or endorsement of each of the books.
1. Mother I got this one for Christmas from my mom. This is an old book that has been brought back to life. It was a lovely read. At times it was very convicting and at the same time inspiring. Convicting in the sense that Mother never wearied in doing good no matter what. She labored to provide meals for her family no matter how early or late or hot. (I am prone to not being so willing when my dear hubby comes home late and needs dinner.) Inspiring because Mother took turns praying at the bedside of one of her children each night and the children relished this time. (I am most nights so tired I just want to get my child in his crib so I can have a moments peace. Oftentimes I don't take the time to pray with him.) My take away from the book isn't even really the full scope of the book. It really is about a daughter that wants a career and to see the world but eventually comes back to the fact that there is no other role model or person she wants to be more like than her Mother.
2. The Money Saving Mom's Budget: Slash Your Spending, Pay Down Your Debt, Streamline Your Life, and Save Thousands a Year by Crystal Paine of moneysavingmom.com
I follow her blog everyday to get the news on deals, coupons and tips for saving money. A good book with lots of good tips although many of them can be found on her website. It is a good resource to have everything right at your finger tips.
I can't remember how I came across this one but I always wanted to read one of those non-Jane Austen written books pretending to be a sequel to a Jane Austen book. Enter....
3. Death Comes to Pemberley by P.D James
This book was a sequel that follows Lizzie & Darcy from Pride and Prejudice. It was a page turner, but I was also very snuggley under a blanket and not feeling the best. Both really good reasons to just keep reading! I liked the book until the author tried to tie another Jane Austen book. I just thought that was forced and weird. My first thought was I can understand the writers of ER wanting to bring back as many characters for their show finale. I love that kind of nostalgia but this not so much. If Jane had done it I would have loved that!
This next book was at the suggestion of one of my old high school classmate's. She posted how much she liked it on Facebook. So I checked it out of the library.
4. Little Princes: One Man's Promise to Bring Home the Lost Children of Nepal
By Conor Grennan
This is easily one of the best books I ever read. It was inspiring. It was a love story. It was action packed and suspenseful. I stayed up until 2:30am to finish -even though my son is an early riser! The author left me thanking God that He inspires some people to do things beyond what they would ever ask or imagine. And they are able to transform hundreds of lives because they stepped out in faith. That is exactly what Conor Grennan did. I learned about a part of the world that I knew nothing of and feel like I smoothed out a little bit of a rough spot in my life long quest to become more well rounded.
You can find out more about his mission and organization to help the Lost Children of Nepal here.
Here is the list and little highlight or endorsement of each of the books.
1. Mother I got this one for Christmas from my mom. This is an old book that has been brought back to life. It was a lovely read. At times it was very convicting and at the same time inspiring. Convicting in the sense that Mother never wearied in doing good no matter what. She labored to provide meals for her family no matter how early or late or hot. (I am prone to not being so willing when my dear hubby comes home late and needs dinner.) Inspiring because Mother took turns praying at the bedside of one of her children each night and the children relished this time. (I am most nights so tired I just want to get my child in his crib so I can have a moments peace. Oftentimes I don't take the time to pray with him.) My take away from the book isn't even really the full scope of the book. It really is about a daughter that wants a career and to see the world but eventually comes back to the fact that there is no other role model or person she wants to be more like than her Mother.
2. The Money Saving Mom's Budget: Slash Your Spending, Pay Down Your Debt, Streamline Your Life, and Save Thousands a Year by Crystal Paine of moneysavingmom.com
I follow her blog everyday to get the news on deals, coupons and tips for saving money. A good book with lots of good tips although many of them can be found on her website. It is a good resource to have everything right at your finger tips.
I can't remember how I came across this one but I always wanted to read one of those non-Jane Austen written books pretending to be a sequel to a Jane Austen book. Enter....
3. Death Comes to Pemberley by P.D James
This book was a sequel that follows Lizzie & Darcy from Pride and Prejudice. It was a page turner, but I was also very snuggley under a blanket and not feeling the best. Both really good reasons to just keep reading! I liked the book until the author tried to tie another Jane Austen book. I just thought that was forced and weird. My first thought was I can understand the writers of ER wanting to bring back as many characters for their show finale. I love that kind of nostalgia but this not so much. If Jane had done it I would have loved that!
This next book was at the suggestion of one of my old high school classmate's. She posted how much she liked it on Facebook. So I checked it out of the library.
4. Little Princes: One Man's Promise to Bring Home the Lost Children of Nepal
By Conor Grennan
This is easily one of the best books I ever read. It was inspiring. It was a love story. It was action packed and suspenseful. I stayed up until 2:30am to finish -even though my son is an early riser! The author left me thanking God that He inspires some people to do things beyond what they would ever ask or imagine. And they are able to transform hundreds of lives because they stepped out in faith. That is exactly what Conor Grennan did. I learned about a part of the world that I knew nothing of and feel like I smoothed out a little bit of a rough spot in my life long quest to become more well rounded.
You can find out more about his mission and organization to help the Lost Children of Nepal here.
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Back Burner Dreams
One thing is for sure being a mom changes things. The chances of using the bathroom by yourself are greatly reduced as is getting to eat a whole banana. Things that were easy to put together on a moments notice - like a girls not out- take a couple weeks to plan.
Moms make sacrifices its just that simple. I am so glad that I had the opportunity to travel and do things before having a baby, it definitely helped get some of the wanderlust out. As moms, I think that the dreams we had for our lives sometimes have to be put on back burners or experienced more as a treat as opposed to a staple. I can't just pick up and travel wherever anymore. I can't stay up like a night owl writing because my son is an early riser and a morning person. I am ok with that. There will be time enough for traveling and staying up late when my children are older. In the meantime, I can travel through a book and write during nap-time - when I am not napping myself!
I have found that even when I had time to take something off the back burner by reading or writing I just surfed the internet instead - not really going very far either. Kind of sad isn't it?
I think I kind of owe it to my child to use my time wisely -so I can be the best kind of mom- and if I can work on the dreams that have always been with me then I should do it. I heard somewhere that to be a good writer you have to be a good reader and I realized I only read 3 books last year and that is pretty pathetic. Is it any wonder, Liz, that writing is more a chore than driving force?
So 3 things will be working on when I have time to take something off the back burner:
1. Reading as much interesting non-fiction as I can (I'll post more on what I have read so far and am looking to read.)
2. Working on my grammar - because let's face I am not good at grammar. ( I have a brush up book you are suppose to complete in 24 hours - I think I have had the book for over 5 years!)
3. Taking a course with the hubby - “Constitution 101: The Meaning and History of the Constitution” is a 10-week online course presented by Hillsdale College.
These seem like important steps in reaching goals and realizing dreams while I am in this particular season of life. I just want to want to use my time well for myself and my family and also for God who gave me gifts and dreams that are meant to be fostered over a lifetime.
Moms make sacrifices its just that simple. I am so glad that I had the opportunity to travel and do things before having a baby, it definitely helped get some of the wanderlust out. As moms, I think that the dreams we had for our lives sometimes have to be put on back burners or experienced more as a treat as opposed to a staple. I can't just pick up and travel wherever anymore. I can't stay up like a night owl writing because my son is an early riser and a morning person. I am ok with that. There will be time enough for traveling and staying up late when my children are older. In the meantime, I can travel through a book and write during nap-time - when I am not napping myself!
I have found that even when I had time to take something off the back burner by reading or writing I just surfed the internet instead - not really going very far either. Kind of sad isn't it?
I think I kind of owe it to my child to use my time wisely -so I can be the best kind of mom- and if I can work on the dreams that have always been with me then I should do it. I heard somewhere that to be a good writer you have to be a good reader and I realized I only read 3 books last year and that is pretty pathetic. Is it any wonder, Liz, that writing is more a chore than driving force?
So 3 things will be working on when I have time to take something off the back burner:
1. Reading as much interesting non-fiction as I can (I'll post more on what I have read so far and am looking to read.)
2. Working on my grammar - because let's face I am not good at grammar. ( I have a brush up book you are suppose to complete in 24 hours - I think I have had the book for over 5 years!)
3. Taking a course with the hubby - “Constitution 101: The Meaning and History of the Constitution” is a 10-week online course presented by Hillsdale College.
These seem like important steps in reaching goals and realizing dreams while I am in this particular season of life. I just want to want to use my time well for myself and my family and also for God who gave me gifts and dreams that are meant to be fostered over a lifetime.
Tuesday, February 07, 2012
Reviewing the Situation
I have been thinking about my mission with the this blog: Because Hope, Glory and Wonder Abound.
So of all things came to my mind today is a song from Oliver Twist where Fagin is "Reviewing the Situation" of whether to continue as a villain or "turn a new leaf." So I go to google.com to find the lyrics and whose birthday is it but Charles Dickens - author of Oliver Twist. Oh the irony.
This is as far as I got in thinking about my mission other than to read my first 4 blog posts, which I have to say were quite inspiring to me but right now there are toys scattered like landmines all over and I should probably attended to the dump trucks and such....
Check August 2006
So of all things came to my mind today is a song from Oliver Twist where Fagin is "Reviewing the Situation" of whether to continue as a villain or "turn a new leaf." So I go to google.com to find the lyrics and whose birthday is it but Charles Dickens - author of Oliver Twist. Oh the irony.
This is as far as I got in thinking about my mission other than to read my first 4 blog posts, which I have to say were quite inspiring to me but right now there are toys scattered like landmines all over and I should probably attended to the dump trucks and such....
Check August 2006
2012 Goals
Of course I am late to get on board with Goals for 2012.
So I am just repeating from last year. :-) sort of.
Most specifically:
Drink water
Take my vitamins
Read to the baby - which isn't as big a deal now that he will actually sit for a book.
Get dressed by 11am - really this should be 9am or much earlier I just can't get it done.
I am adding to this year:
Read more books. I have already read more books in Januray than I read all last year.
Pray more about stuff like finances, wisdom in parenting, consistency in discipline, and nice neighbors...
Do some kind of Bible reading, Christian music / devotional time during the day because I feel like I have a neighbor I could visit during the day and I wait until bedtime to talk to Him and enjoy His company.
So I am just repeating from last year. :-) sort of.
Most specifically:
Drink water
Take my vitamins
Read to the baby - which isn't as big a deal now that he will actually sit for a book.
Get dressed by 11am - really this should be 9am or much earlier
I am adding to this year:
Read more books. I have already read more books in Januray than I read all last year.
Pray more about stuff like finances, wisdom in parenting, consistency in discipline, and nice neighbors...
Do some kind of Bible reading, Christian music / devotional time during the day because I feel like I have a neighbor I could visit during the day and I wait until bedtime to talk to Him and enjoy His company.
Since I Discovered the FlyLady
The FlyLady is the home-keeper's organizational, inspirational and instructional wellspring. I had actually heard of her many years ago but didn't need what she had to offer in my stage of life. So when I heard our MOPS speaker was going to share what she learned from the FlyLady I decided to check her out. I also had come across some rather gross discoveries in my home most notably mentioned in the dishpan post - a colony of dust bunnies and oh yeah a broken vacuum. Then, there was the baby's bath tub that I still shutter to think about. Just the overall revelation that if I were to have another baby and no plan for keeping the house clean and meals on the table not only would we have a dirty tub but we would be eating a lot of cereal.
So I made some changes. This is what I have done so far.
Meal Planning - I could never do a weekly plan because I don't want to be locked into chicken on Tuesday in case I am not in the mood for chicken or if something comes up and there isn't time to make chicken. Yet I know I needed a plan because trying to figure it out at 4pm wasn't working either! So I thought and I thought: What would work for me? The solution was 4 meals at a time. I usually only make 4 meals a week anyhow. So I pick 4 meals and write down the key ingredient if the recipes is in a book and what ingredients I might need. Then, each day if I need to make a meal because leftover are done or promised for lunch I pick one of the four meals. It is really working for me! This plan has built in flexibility which is what me and my palate need!
The 2nd Flylady change this night owl is getting to bed at a decent hour. I don't wake up well - never have- I don't think going to bed any earlier is helping me get up but having extra sleep isn't hurting. What I have done is set my cell phone to go off at 9:30 each night. This reminds me that I have 30 minutes to get to bed if I want to hit my target of being in bed by 10 to read and do my devotions. The 9:30 warning reminds me not to start anything new - like a movie, or to finish up what I am working on. In fact one night while watching the Sherlock Holmes movie I stopped in the middle to go to bed. That took some discipline! I do allow myself the freedom to decide 1-2 times a week to stay up later if I have something I need to do like a blog post or something I need peace and quite for. This worked well most of November. I'll admit I was sloppy during the Christmas season because I had so many projects to work on. The reminder really helped me be aware of my decision making. Since actually drafting this post many, many weeks ago my husband got a hold of my phone and turned off the alarm. He hated it. However, I am still pretty cognizant of 9:30 rolling around and have been working on getting to bed at a decent hour without the alarm.
The 3rd change is cleaning by zones. Each week I focus on a different room for deeper cleaning, decluttering and reorganizing as needed. The whole idea is to keep maintaining cleanliness instead of tackling piles of dirt once they mount up enough to move me. This way I know my shower stall and curtain will get a good cleaning at least once a month.
All this was going really well and then, well, life happened and taking a nap just seemed way more important than dusting. So I took a break but I am working on getting back into the groove.
So I made some changes. This is what I have done so far.
Meal Planning - I could never do a weekly plan because I don't want to be locked into chicken on Tuesday in case I am not in the mood for chicken or if something comes up and there isn't time to make chicken. Yet I know I needed a plan because trying to figure it out at 4pm wasn't working either! So I thought and I thought: What would work for me? The solution was 4 meals at a time. I usually only make 4 meals a week anyhow. So I pick 4 meals and write down the key ingredient if the recipes is in a book and what ingredients I might need. Then, each day if I need to make a meal because leftover are done or promised for lunch I pick one of the four meals. It is really working for me! This plan has built in flexibility which is what me and my palate need!
The 2nd Flylady change this night owl is getting to bed at a decent hour. I don't wake up well - never have- I don't think going to bed any earlier is helping me get up but having extra sleep isn't hurting. What I have done is set my cell phone to go off at 9:30 each night. This reminds me that I have 30 minutes to get to bed if I want to hit my target of being in bed by 10 to read and do my devotions. The 9:30 warning reminds me not to start anything new - like a movie, or to finish up what I am working on. In fact one night while watching the Sherlock Holmes movie I stopped in the middle to go to bed. That took some discipline! I do allow myself the freedom to decide 1-2 times a week to stay up later if I have something I need to do like a blog post or something I need peace and quite for. This worked well most of November. I'll admit I was sloppy during the Christmas season because I had so many projects to work on. The reminder really helped me be aware of my decision making. Since actually drafting this post many, many weeks ago my husband got a hold of my phone and turned off the alarm. He hated it. However, I am still pretty cognizant of 9:30 rolling around and have been working on getting to bed at a decent hour without the alarm.
The 3rd change is cleaning by zones. Each week I focus on a different room for deeper cleaning, decluttering and reorganizing as needed. The whole idea is to keep maintaining cleanliness instead of tackling piles of dirt once they mount up enough to move me. This way I know my shower stall and curtain will get a good cleaning at least once a month.
All this was going really well and then, well, life happened and taking a nap just seemed way more important than dusting. So I took a break but I am working on getting back into the groove.
Monday, December 12, 2011
3 Gifts for Christmas
Last year, my husband and I decided to start a new Christmas tradition. We would only give our son 3 Christmas gifts, symbolic of the Wise Men’s 3 gifts for baby Jesus – gold frankincense and myrrh.
My cousins follow this tradition and I have read on blogs about others celebrating Christmas in this way. One blog explained how the parents taught the symbolism to their children. Gold is for a want – that big item they are longing for. Frankincense is for something spiritual that will help develop their character like a Christian CD, DVD or book. Myrrh is for something practical like a new outfit or snow boots. For older kids, I think it would be a lot easier to emphasize these meanings; for little ones everything is fun, practical and educational.
Limiting ourselves to three gifts should help keep the house from being overrun with toys, our budget in check, and keep our son from expecting a ton of toys for Christmas – taking his focus off the real meaning we want him to understand and appreciate.
All was well with my son’s Christmas list, until my husband decided he wants to buy our son a train set. This is great after all trains run in the Higgins’ blood and right now the kid has “Train Brain”. However, this meant I was down to picking out two from the list! I had a little freak out. Suddenly limiting ourselves to just three seemed impossible! Whose idea was this anyway? Why torture myself? Can I just spoil him rotten for his birthday in February? Can I wait till February? And what about stocking stuffers like toothbrushes and socks?
The truth of the matter is I am really excited to have new toys in the house just as much as my husband is really excited about getting him a train. I have grown a little tired of stacking boxes, cars that talk, and “chew toys”. I am ready for Legos, tools and workbenches, castles made of blocks, and choo choo trains that really “choo choo.” Mostly we are excited because our son is getting to that stage where he knows stuff, and he is interested in things like trains and dump trucks. He is just so much fun!
I had to take a deep breath. Working on this article forced me to reevaluation this new tradition and then wrestle what I really want to do. My husband and I decided on this tradition but it should not be a burden or an idol. It should not be a source of guilt if I decide to fill his stocking with a bunch of toothbrushes and socks bumping him up a few more gifts. Feeling guilty defeats Jesus’ purpose for entering this world…
For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. John 3:17
Giving three gifts in keeping with the Wise Men’s three gifts is a boundary not a commandment so we don’t over indulge or overspend and so we can teach the true meaning of Christmas without Jesus being crowded out by a mound of gifts. It’s a way to treat our son and not spoil him. It sets a precedent so he doesn’t grow up expecting more but rather is content with just a few.
My husband has found the perfect train, and I mustered up some restraint and think I can wait until his birthday in February for the other toy I had in mind. I did decide to give myself the freedom to stuff his stocking with little necessities like socks, toothbrushes maybe a coloring book because seriously what kid has been spoiled at Christmas by too many toothbrushes!
Saturday, December 10, 2011
Compassion Gives a Future
I received a letter from my Compassion International Child this week. I have watched -from afar- this Indian boy grow up. His sweet melancholy little 5/6 year old face won my heart almost a decade ago. He has grown into to a tall, smart looking teenager. He said in his letter this week, " I have six months more in school. After my school I am willing to study computer engineering in the college." I was moved to tears.
My sometimes meager, sometimes hard earned funds have helped a poor boy in India have a future. What an honor to be apart of his life. Now he not only has the chance at college but he knows Jesus too.
I guess once he graduates we will no longer be able to write to me; I will have to wait until Heaven to meet him. What a sweet time that will be.
My sometimes meager, sometimes hard earned funds have helped a poor boy in India have a future. What an honor to be apart of his life. Now he not only has the chance at college but he knows Jesus too.
I guess once he graduates we will no longer be able to write to me; I will have to wait until Heaven to meet him. What a sweet time that will be.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
The Turkey Song
The Turkey Song
A Turkey sat on the barnyard fence,
And he sang this sad, sad, tune,
Thanksgiving Day is coming!
Gobble Gobble Gobble Gobble
And I know I'll Be Eaten Soon!
Gobble Gobble Gobble Gobble,
I don't like Thanksgiving Day
Gobble Gobble Gobble Gobble,
I would like to Run Away!
And he sang this sad, sad, tune,
Thanksgiving Day is coming!
Gobble Gobble Gobble Gobble
And I know I'll Be Eaten Soon!
Gobble Gobble Gobble Gobble,
I don't like Thanksgiving Day
Gobble Gobble Gobble Gobble,
I would like to Run Away!
For as long as I can remember, The Turkey Song has been as much a part of our family's Thanksgiving as the turkey or pumpkin pie. I always looked forward to Grandpop singing it. On Thanksgivings when he was not eating with us, singing the song without him just seemed kind stale even sacrilegious. This is our first Thanksgiving where no one will get to hear him sing it. Though if I know my Grandpop he will amuse a host of angels with his crooning.
This Thanksgiving I am thankful for so many years of listening to my Grandpop sing at the dinner table. I am also thankful that I got to record him singing this song for the last time so that my Walter will never be able to forget him. Thanks for the memories Pop. Gobble, gobble, gobble.
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
5 Kernels of Corn
I picked up The Light and the Glory by Peter Marshall and David Manuel today to brush up on my Thanksgiving history. The true poignant bits of history are so often lost. Instead we now hear all about the big bad Englishmen taking over the Native American's land. For the record, the land the Pilgrims settled on belonged to no one - anymore. The tribe of Indians who had lived there all died a few years before the Pilgrims landed.
Anyway, this is one of my favorite bits of history about Thanksgiving. An influx of more people from England - with no supplies- forced the people of Plymouth to ration their food. All winter long each person was given 5 kernels of corn a day. This is what they survived on. How? Only by God's grace.
On the 2nd Thanksgiving, least they forget how God helped the colony survive on 5 kernels a day the 1st course of the 2nd Thanksgiving meal was - a plate with 5 kernels of corn. A reminder to be thankful in lean times and even more so in abundant times.
Anyway, this is one of my favorite bits of history about Thanksgiving. An influx of more people from England - with no supplies- forced the people of Plymouth to ration their food. All winter long each person was given 5 kernels of corn a day. This is what they survived on. How? Only by God's grace.
On the 2nd Thanksgiving, least they forget how God helped the colony survive on 5 kernels a day the 1st course of the 2nd Thanksgiving meal was - a plate with 5 kernels of corn. A reminder to be thankful in lean times and even more so in abundant times.
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Down with Dishdrainer
Who knew that a stainless steel dish drainer could have so much power? We moved in September and I was appalled at the dust under my bed. I kept thinking, “If my Gram saw this I would be mortified.” She is the kind of homekeeper who washes the windows because its time to wash them not necessarily because she can’t see through the dirt anymore!
As we have been settling into our new place, I am trying to establish better homekeeping and cleaning strategies so I can be a little bit more like my Gram. (Even at 90, I think she will always work circles around me.) I made up a chore sheet for myself of all the things that need to be done. There are things that I just don’t think to do to maintain cleanliness until it is obviously dirty. The reason Gram’s windows aren’t really dirty when she cleans them in the spring is because she cleaned them in the fall – not 3 years ago! So I am working on it, which brings me to the dish drainer.
I should preface by saying I don’t have a dishwasher, so a dish drainer is a necessity right?! Yet, it’s ever presence on my counter has always felt a little like a black hole sucking in any attempt of uncluttering my counter. I also hate the way the tray collects water. There is always slime growing and rust spots on the tray because when I would think to clean it the sink was full of dirty dishes or the drainer was full of clean ones.
In our new kitchen, I gained more cabinet space but I lost counter space. So that dish drainer became an even bigger big black hole and I felt like I was being sucked into everyday. I would glare at it while I tried to conjure up more room for meal preparation. Until one day it occurred to me, like someone spoke from the glorious heavens above. “Why don’t you try going without it?” Could this be sheer brilliance? Could this be the answer to my counter space woes? So I emptied it, cleaned it and stashed it up high. Then, marveled –seriously marveled at the acres of open space I saw. I laid down a towel, started washing dishes, and then I dried them and put them away. Now my goal is to go to bed with no dishes in the sink or on the counter.
Between the dish drainer and the dust bunnies I feel liberated from a cluttered counter and motivated to tackle dirt and dust before it tackles me – just like my Gram does.
If you need something to help you get your butt into gear I highly recommend moving! It will reveal all those dusty critters or you might just want to clean under your bed. If you are feeling like your own black hole is sucking you in, whether it’s a dish drainer or a hall closet just make a change, put it away, clean it out, or purge. Do what you have been wanting to do and have been putting off. Then, just see if making a change in that area doesn’t act as a catalyst to other areas of homekeeping.(More on that later)
Or you could just go visit my Gram…
Friday, October 21, 2011
Projects Done
So I am working out my new cleaning and organizing system. Feeling very proud of myself that I don't have to scold Walter for touching the shower curtain when he takes a bath. I am feeling so motivated that I actually worked on a several projects and I am feeling mighty proud of my accomplishments this week.
This week is bedroom week so while the little monkey played in his room I dusted which brought me to the yard of fabric I just threw over the dresser while unpacking. I decided this is only 4 simple straight lines, I will pull out the sewing machine, put up the gate and sew right outside of his room. Worked like a charm and took no time at all. Project: Done.
While the machine was out I figured I would go ahead and hem a king size blanket I cut down to fit our bed. It was like a red fuzzy albatross around my neck now ... Project: Done! No picture. A picture doesn't do justice to the satisfaction of having that finally done.
Later on that day, I started working on a little pumpkin project which I found here. So many times I see really cute projects that I know I could do but I just don't take the time so much easier to surf the internet...but because I am feeling highly motivated... I have 4 patchwork pumpkins to keep or give away. Although in this picture it looks like I may end up with 3! This project took me a couple days to finish completely.
A couple weeks ago, I bought a HUGE box of organic apples from an Amish farmer. I am not sure it is any cheaper than buying organic in the store but at least I won't have to remember to buy it for a couple months. 7 pints of applesauce to be added to the other 12 I did in 2 other batches over the last 2 weeks.
I thought I would try some apple butter too while I was at it, and now I have 7 half pints (oh that reminds me of Laura Ingles - but I digress). Unfortunately, the apple butter really didn't make the oatmeal I had for breakfast any more palatable. Maybe it will be better in Cream of Wheat as my husband calls it. I prefer to call it by its rightful name, Farina.
Well before you start turning green with envy ;-) please note my sink is full of dirty dishes and my bed hasn't been made in 2 days.
Next weeks project won't be nearly as fun it involves bank statements and Quickbooks...
While the machine was out I figured I would go ahead and hem a king size blanket I cut down to fit our bed. It was like a red fuzzy albatross around my neck now ... Project: Done! No picture. A picture doesn't do justice to the satisfaction of having that finally done.
Later on that day, I started working on a little pumpkin project which I found here. So many times I see really cute projects that I know I could do but I just don't take the time so much easier to surf the internet...but because I am feeling highly motivated... I have 4 patchwork pumpkins to keep or give away. Although in this picture it looks like I may end up with 3! This project took me a couple days to finish completely.
A couple weeks ago, I bought a HUGE box of organic apples from an Amish farmer. I am not sure it is any cheaper than buying organic in the store but at least I won't have to remember to buy it for a couple months. 7 pints of applesauce to be added to the other 12 I did in 2 other batches over the last 2 weeks.
I thought I would try some apple butter too while I was at it, and now I have 7 half pints (oh that reminds me of Laura Ingles - but I digress). Unfortunately, the apple butter really didn't make the oatmeal I had for breakfast any more palatable. Maybe it will be better in Cream of Wheat as my husband calls it. I prefer to call it by its rightful name, Farina. Well before you start turning green with envy ;-) please note my sink is full of dirty dishes and my bed hasn't been made in 2 days.
Next weeks project won't be nearly as fun it involves bank statements and Quickbooks...
Monday, October 17, 2011
The Prequel Review
I can't help myself. I have to critique more fully Anne of Green Gables: A New Beginning
with more than just a post of disappointment on facebook.
First, I must set the stage. In part 3 of the Anne of Green Gables series, The Continuing Story of Anne the movie could stand alone as a good enough movie. For the Anne fans, who have read the books and love the story of Anne the way the author Lucy Maude Montgomery writes it, the movie really was a travesty. Still I watch it from time to time because I love seeing Anne and Gilbert even if the storyline is completely NOTHING like the book. In the books, Anne & Gilbert's kids were involved in World War 1 not them -apart from being concerned parents. If Kevin Sullivan the producer wanted to do a movie on World War 1 and Anne sticking to the book Rilla of Ingleside would have thrilled us Anne fans beyond measure. Alas, he just makes up stories and calls the characters Anne and Gilbert. It is a disgrace really.
Then, there comes the Prequel. The actress who played Anne was adorable and she did nice job. However, the storyline was ridiculous and insulting. I would swear that Lucy -the creator of the Anne character- is spinning in her grave.
The movie is supposed to be what happened to Anne before she came to Green Gables. The movie upends everything we know about Anne. Most importantly, Anne was not orphaned at 3 months when her parents died of the fever. Her father accidentally drove her mother into a ditch and she died and he was blamed. Anne was a 7-9 years old at the time. Then. all this junk went on and she was bounced around ended up living with this rich lady Mrs. Thomas until she died. It was all so ridiculous and not worth writing about.
The thing I find insulting though is that secret letter's belonging to Marilla were found hidden under a floorboard in Green Gables. Among the letters was a letter from Walter Shirley, Anne's father where he writes that he has fallen on better times and would like to know about Anne and maybe see her. Marilla never told Anne about the letter. Really?! Marilla would do that!? Deny Anne access to her father! Not even a deathbed confession. Marilla would never do that to Anne. She would never be that dishonest. She would not be dishonest. Marilla was a pillar of honesty and truth and strove to do the right thing. It is what she taught Anne. So for "them" to write this drivel into the movie and smear the character of Marilla just so Kevin Sullivan can put out another Anne movie that is not really about Anne at all but really "unAnnes" the whole storyline it just infuriates me.
The movie wasn't even a good enough stand alone movie. The acting was weak, the storyline weak, things were brought up and then not developed. Anne repeated lines from the original movie that just seemed so weird to be used again in a different setting. If you are going to write a whole new story about Anne's life come up with original dialogue too. It was such a disappointing movie on so many levels. Compounding the disappointment that as good as the books are "they" still won't just make the books into movies (shows). It is what real Anne fan's want to see -the books come to life on the screen.
So if you want to torture yourself watch the movie, but I can almost guarantee you -the Anne fan- will be disappointed.
with more than just a post of disappointment on facebook.
First, I must set the stage. In part 3 of the Anne of Green Gables series, The Continuing Story of Anne the movie could stand alone as a good enough movie. For the Anne fans, who have read the books and love the story of Anne the way the author Lucy Maude Montgomery writes it, the movie really was a travesty. Still I watch it from time to time because I love seeing Anne and Gilbert even if the storyline is completely NOTHING like the book. In the books, Anne & Gilbert's kids were involved in World War 1 not them -apart from being concerned parents. If Kevin Sullivan the producer wanted to do a movie on World War 1 and Anne sticking to the book Rilla of Ingleside would have thrilled us Anne fans beyond measure. Alas, he just makes up stories and calls the characters Anne and Gilbert. It is a disgrace really.
Then, there comes the Prequel. The actress who played Anne was adorable and she did nice job. However, the storyline was ridiculous and insulting. I would swear that Lucy -the creator of the Anne character- is spinning in her grave.
The movie is supposed to be what happened to Anne before she came to Green Gables. The movie upends everything we know about Anne. Most importantly, Anne was not orphaned at 3 months when her parents died of the fever. Her father accidentally drove her mother into a ditch and she died and he was blamed. Anne was a 7-9 years old at the time. Then. all this junk went on and she was bounced around ended up living with this rich lady Mrs. Thomas until she died. It was all so ridiculous and not worth writing about.
The thing I find insulting though is that secret letter's belonging to Marilla were found hidden under a floorboard in Green Gables. Among the letters was a letter from Walter Shirley, Anne's father where he writes that he has fallen on better times and would like to know about Anne and maybe see her. Marilla never told Anne about the letter. Really?! Marilla would do that!? Deny Anne access to her father! Not even a deathbed confession. Marilla would never do that to Anne. She would never be that dishonest. She would not be dishonest. Marilla was a pillar of honesty and truth and strove to do the right thing. It is what she taught Anne. So for "them" to write this drivel into the movie and smear the character of Marilla just so Kevin Sullivan can put out another Anne movie that is not really about Anne at all but really "unAnnes" the whole storyline it just infuriates me.
The movie wasn't even a good enough stand alone movie. The acting was weak, the storyline weak, things were brought up and then not developed. Anne repeated lines from the original movie that just seemed so weird to be used again in a different setting. If you are going to write a whole new story about Anne's life come up with original dialogue too. It was such a disappointing movie on so many levels. Compounding the disappointment that as good as the books are "they" still won't just make the books into movies (shows). It is what real Anne fan's want to see -the books come to life on the screen.
So if you want to torture yourself watch the movie, but I can almost guarantee you -the Anne fan- will be disappointed.
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